“Man, how does a person do that?” John Gage inquired as he glanced over at his partner. Driving the squad back to Station 51, where they were assigned to A-shift, Roy DeSoto shrugged.

“You heard what she said. It was an accident.”

“I know that. But she’s got an upright. She’s s’posed to be behind the darn thing.”

“If I remember right, she said she was.”

Johnny just looked out the passenger window and tried to envision how the first ‘rescue’ of the shift had come about. A young woman had been vacuuming her apartment when she ran over part of her left foot with the appliance. It resulted in a broken big toe and a slice up the middle of the nail. As hard as he tried, Gage just couldn’t get from the vacuum being in front of her, to the front of it running over her toe.

“It just doesn’t make sense, Roy.”

His partner glanced over with a slight grin. “If it bothers you that much, why don’t you get a hold of her later and have her draw you a diagram. Maybe she’ll include her phone number and you’ll get a date.”

“Ooooh noooo,” he said, quickly pushing that idea away. “No-oh. Huh uh. I make enough trips to Rampart as it is. . .as a paramedic and a patient. I don’t need a girlfriend who adds more.”

“Good point.”

Johnny shot him a quick glare, then shook his head. “It’s just weird, Roy. And somehow I get the feeling it’s not a good thing to start a shift with a weird rescue.”

“Why? What’ve you heard that I haven’t?”

“Nothin’. I just don’t think it’s a good sign,” he shrugged.

“Look at it this way. . .it can only go uphill from here.”

Johnny shook his head. “Don’tcha remember that Wednesday we had all those weird calls? It never went up hill. In fact, if you’ll recall, it went very downhill for me. Literally.”

“Oh yeah. Your fall down the hill when that drunk guy wrecked his car.”  He recalled how Johnny had hurried down a steep grassy slope to reach a vehicle that had gone over the embankment and crashed near the bottom. He warned Gage to take it easy. The younger man didn’t exactly listen and had taken a tumble midway, twisting his knee. The driver of the car was uninjured since the alcohol in his system kept him relaxed. “I’d say we got the slew of strange stuff out of the way on that Wednesday. I mean, the odds of it happening to us again like that are astronomical.”

Suddenly the radio crackled and Sam Lanier’s voice from LA Dispatch followed. “Squad 51, woman bitten, 2543 North Hill Street, two five four three North Hill Street, time out, 09:11.”

Johnny gave the mic a wary look as he picked it up. “Squad 51, 10-4.”

He replaced it in the holder, then whipped out his green pen and note pad from his shirt pocket and jotted down the information. “I wonder what bit ‘er? I wonder if we really wanna find out?”

Roy just shook his head. “The odds are astronomical. Mark my words.”

Johnny just looked at the address, his brow furrowed as he tried to imagine what they were about to encounter. He hoped, though doubted, his partner was right.

E!E!E!E!

Roy pulled the squad slowly to the curb before coming to a complete stop. After cutting the siren he joined his partner on the sidewalk and grabbed the bio-phone from its compartment.

The paramedic team turned on their heels and began the trek up the walkway towards the Los Angeles Performing Arts Center. When they entered the building, a silver haired gentleman who appeared to be vastly approaching his eightieth year immediately met them. He was in full makeup and resembled Dracula, cape and all.

“Am I hapae to tee you. Hawiet’s white tis way,” he managed before turning and marching towards the double doors of the mezzanine level. The paramedics glanced at one another but didn’t say a word. The trio walked through the doors and upon reaching the stage climbed the stairs on the side of the stage and approached a woman holding a hand to her neck.

“Thank goodness you’re here. I think I’m about to faint,” she declared.

Johnny reached the sixty-five-year old first and took her by the arm. “Why don’t you sit,” he instructed while guiding her toward a bench. With her seated and the risk of her keeling over eliminated, Johnny lowered himself to one knee. That’s when he noticed the other people on the stage were all on their hands and knees, looking down at the stage floor. A blue haired woman was off stage pulling back the red suede curtain and looking behind it.

“Don’t mind ‘em, dar jus shirten fo my denters.” Dracula smiled a toothless top row smile at Johnny.

Johnny smiled back and returned his attention to Harriet. “So what seems to be the problem?” he asked.

“It’s my neck, Harold bit it.” She nodded her head towards Dracula.

“I was suppos to!” Harold responded.

Ignoring the man standing behind him, Johnny repeated, “Harold bit it?”

“Yes.” Harriet nodded her head up and down.

“Well, let’s take a look at it, shall we?” Johnny reached up and gently peeled the woman’s hand away from her neck, revealing a bite mark, which was bleeding slightly.

The paramedic lifted himself up to both feet and bent at the waist to examine the puncture wound. “It doesn’t look too serious. I’ll clean it up, put a bandage on it and it’ll be good as new.” He smiled.

While Johnny treated the senior, Roy contacted the hospital, “Rampart, Squad 51, how do you read?”

“Go ahead, 51,” Doctor Early replied.

“Rampart, we have a woman approximately sixty, has a slight contusion on her neck, the result of a bite.”

“What kind of bite?”

Roy looked at his partner and couldn’t believe he was about to respond as he was “Human, Rampart.”

“Could you repeat, 51?”

Roy drew in a breath and let it out before repeating, “A human bite, Rampart.”

“How are her vitals, 51?”

Once again Roy looked at Johnny and scribbled down the numbers his partner fired at him before repeating them to the hospital staff.

“51, clean and bandage the wound and advise the patient to see her family doctor. She may need a tetanus shot.”

“10-4, Rampart.”

Roy disconnected the line and dismantled the phone. As he closed the lid he heard Johnny telling Harriet she was good as new.

“Wha abow mi tee?” Dracula demanded.

“Your teeth! That’s all you’re worried about? I could have died!” Harriet screamed at her leading man. “Can you believe him?” she asked Johnny.

“Well--” Johnny began before being cut off.

“Harold Polski, you need to get yourself a better bonding glue for those teeth. It’s bad enough you bit me too hard and made me bleed, but when they fell out of your mouth, they fell right into my dress!” The woman rose to her feet, reached a hand into the front of her dress and pulled out the top portion of Dracula’s teeth.

“As I mentioned, ma’am. You need to see your doctor so he can either give you a tetanus shot or rule it out.” Johnny began to back his way from the arguing duo.

When the paramedics were back in the squad Johnny turned to Roy and opened his mouth but was quickly cut off. “Don’t say it.” Roy warned.

Johnny closed his mouth and turned his head to look out the passenger window. They had managed to drive for another five minutes before he couldn’t take it any longer. “Oh come on, Roy. You have to admit, that was one weird call.”

“It was odd.”

“Odd doesn’t even begin to describe that. Imagine the man bites her neck, draws blood, and his dentures fall out and into her dress. It doesn’t get much weirder than that.”

Roy backed the squad into the bay area of the station and quickly exited the vehicle.

E!E!E!E!

Engine crew members Mike Stoker and Marco Lopez looked up from their seats at the table in the dayroom as first Roy walked in, soon followed by Johnny. The firemen had a game of Checkers set up in front of them and had obviously been playing awhile.

“Roy, think about. . .it—wha? What’s goin’ on here?” Johnny asked when he suddenly noticed his shiftmates had the game out. “How do you guys get off playin’ a game of Checkers while we’re out workin’ in the Twilight Zone?”

Roy looked at him in more surprise than the others. “Isn’t that getting a little carried away? It’s only been two rescues.”

“So far,” Johnny emphasized.

“What’s he talking about?” Mike wondered.

Roy shook his head as he walked toward the refrigerator. “You don’t wanna know.”

Mike and Marco both looked to Johnny, hoping for an explanation anyway. But it wasn’t to be. Gage was right alongside his partner, carrying on about astronomical odds being astronomical.

The two shrugged and went back to their game. When the third member of the engine crew, Chet Kelly, walked in, the klaxons sounded. The squad was being sent out on another run, this time an unknown type rescue. The paramedics rushed past Chet, Johnny saying with a shake of his head, “Just wait, Roy. You’ll see. It’s the Twilight Zone, all we’re lacking is the music.”

Bewildered, but knowing the call needed to be acknowledged, Chet followed them to the doorway. He stopped when he saw their captain was already at the podium, the mic in hand. The curly-haired fireman stepped back into the dayroom and eyed his two crewmates.

“What was that all about?”

“Don’t ask us,” Mike said with a shrug.

“Yeah,” Marco added, “All we know is Johnny’s into some kind of astronomy.”  He looked to Mike to see if he’d gotten it right and the engineer just shrugged again.

The bewildered expression remained on Chet’s face as his gaze shifted from them to the doorway where the squad could be heard leaving the apparatus bay.

What’s *that* got to do with the Twilight Zone?

E!E!E!E!

Roy brought the squad to a stop in front of a modest house with a well manicured lawn. All seemed quiet until a man in his late twenties came out to greet them.

"Doesn't look good, Roy,” Johnny stated. “He's laughing. I swear - "

The senior paramedic shook his head as he climbed out, then shut the driver’s side door.

"I'm glad you guys are here," the man said, obviously trying to keep a straight face.

"What seems to be the problem, Mr. - "

"Johnson. Bill Johnson. It's my wife Karen. You guys aren't going to believe this one. C'mon inside. She's in the bedroom."

Johnny grabbed the equipment as Roy followed Mr. Johnson. The inside of the house was as neat as the outside and they soon found themselves in the young couple's bedroom. Mrs. Johnson was sitting on the end of the bed leaning forward. She appeared to be in a great deal of pain.

"Honey, the paramedics are here. It'll be fine. Honest." He turned away still trying to keep a neutral appearance in front of his wife.

Roy kneeled on the floor beside the bed, pushing aside a shiny new pair of boots, and spoke to the patient. "Mrs. Johnson? What seems to be the problem?"

"Ooooowwww," she hissed trying not to move too much as she tried to face the paramedic. "Karen, please call me Karen. Mrs. Johnson is my mother-in-law."

"All right Karen. I'm Roy and my partner here is John. He's going to get some vitals on you while I ask you a few questions. Can you tell me exactly what happened and where it hurts."

"I'll do my best. It's really rather embarrassing but here goes. You see, they're new and I really couldn't wait to wear them so I thought today would be the day to do it."

"Wear what? I'm confused."

She gave a painful sideways glance at her husband. "You didn't tell them?"

"Sorry, honey. I really thought it should come from you. Besides, I didn't think they'd believe me."

"Karen, can you please just tell us what happened?"

"New boots."

Johnny nearly dropped the notepad he was jotting the vitals on. "Boots?"

"Yeah," she sighed. "New boots. I was trying to get them on and they're really stiff so I was pulling and pushing and well... I sorta lost my balance and then something in my back popped and it hurt so bad I couldn't move!"

"Your back?"

"Yeah. I just can't explain it but I felt it and then it really hurt, a lot."

Roy was afraid to look at his partner because he knew what the younger man was thinking. "Does anything else hurt?"

"My neck kinda hurts and my right ankle too," she admitted.

Johnny called the vitals and scenario in to Rampart, and waited instructions. It wasn’t long before the doctor’s transmission was complete.

"10-4 Rampart." To his partner he repeated, "They want full spinal precautions, Roy. I'll go get what we need from the squad."

Karen looked nervous. "What does that mean?"

"It means we have to put a neck brace on you and then immobilize you for transport to the hospital. The doctor feels you need to be looked at right away to make sure it isn't something more serious."

Karen started to cry. Bill went to his wife. "I'm sorry I laughed honey. You have to admit it really is a freak thing to happen. I didn't think it was this serious." He gave her a gentle hug as Roy started to apply the collar.

Once she was strapped to the board and loaded on the gurney, her husband asked, "Should I ride with her or follow in the car?"

"She'll be all right. Johnny will ride in with her and if you follow, then you'll have a ride home later."

"Okay. Thanks, guys. I don't know that I could have kept a straight face through all of this. How do you guys do it?"

"It's all just part of the job. We see some strange things every so often and it makes situations like this seem almost normal."

"You guys should write a book. Thanks again."

Roy closed the ambulance doors and slapped the back to let the driver know it was safe to leave. He loaded the equipment back onto the squad and set off for Rampart.

E!E!E!E!

Dr. Morton sent Karen for x-rays not long after her arrival. He had a hard time believing she sprained her back trying to put on a pair of boots.

"Are you sure you guys didn't make this up? You know, trying to pull one over on me as a joke. Is this for real?"

Johnny raised both hands to shoulder level. "Doc, I swear. This is for real. It's been one of those days. Every call we've had so far - "

"Easy, Johnny. You can't say that. It's just been a few odd coincidences so far. The day isn't even half over," Roy argued.

"My point exactly! Like I said before it's like something out of the Twilight Zone."

Dr. Morton shook his head. By the look on Roy's face he could see it was going to be a long shift for the paramedics in more ways than one and he hoped that it didn't spill over to Rampart General.

Stopping at the nurses' station, they picked up a few supplies, bid farewell to Mr. Johnson, and returned to the squad.

"I'm telling you, Roy - "

Holding up a hand he said, "Enough about this already. Okay? I just want to rest of the shift to go peacefully. Think we can manage that?"

Johnny appeared affronted. "I don't know what your problem is, Roy. You act like I'm making a big deal out of this. You don't want to talk about it, fine."

He sat back and quietly looked out the window. Roy hoped he hadn't upset his partner to much but he was down to his last nerve and the shift wasn't even half over yet. It was going to be a long day. He hoped they got a break from these oddball calls.

E!E!E!E!

Continuing to ride along in silence, Roy was startled by the voice of Sam Lanier coming over their radio. “Squad, 51, unknown type injury…2561 Rosewood Drive…cross street Sampson…2561 Rosewood…time out 11:56.”

“Squad 51,” Johnny responded on the mic as Roy switched on the lights and siren, and accelerated on the gas pedal.

“Looks like we’re gonna be kept busy today,” Roy commented, feeling a need to fill the silence that once again took over the vehicle.

“Yeah, with crazy calls to boot.” Johnny groaned, “I’m hungry.”

Roy glanced at his partner noticing a look of annoyance on the younger man’s face. He hoped after this call they’d be able to get a break and head back to the station. He, too, was beginning to feel the inklings of hunger pains. Reaching their intended location, he slowed the truck to a stop and exited the vehicle, joining Johnny at the squad’s compartments, pulling out the drug box while his partner handled the biophone.

The duo walked up the front walkway to a half brick half vinyl siding bungalow with black shutters attached to either side of the three windows facing the road. Johnny reached the beige door first and rapped his free hand against it. They waited a few seconds and received no response so he rapped once again this time adding, “Fire Department!”

Roy walked to a window which was obviously a bedroom and peered inside. Not seeing any movement in the house, he walked around the back of the bungalow while Johnny continued to knock on the door, again alerting anyone inside that they were from the fire department.

A few moments later, the door opened and Johnny was shocked to see his partner on the other side.

“I saw her through the living room window and the back door was open. She’s in here,” Roy explained as he started back into the house. His partner followed him through the small kitchen and into the living room. A woman was sitting on the floor leaning against the sofa, looking more than a little pale. Her breathing seemed fine and she didn’t look as though she was in pain, but passing out did appear to be an option.

While moving toward her, Johnny did a visual sweep of her form, as Roy introduced himself. “Ma’am, I’m Roy DeSoto with the county fire department. This is my partner, John.” Once they were in front of her, Roy squatted down and took in the injury with the closer view. “How’d this happen?”

At the same time Johnny set up the biophone, wondering to himself if he was dreaming. The woman’s right foot had been impaled by a knitting needle.

How in the world could someone impale themselves with a knitting needle? he thought to himself

“I’m so embarrassed,” The woman groaned. “I work at the local grocery store and today is my day off. I have two little ones, one in the second grade and one in the fourth. I was hoping to do some catching up on my Christmas knitting. I’m making Jimmy a sweater. Anyway, the phone rang so I placed my work on the sofa and went to the kitchen. I have no idea how it happened but my needle must have fallen off and when I placed my foot down…well, you can see what happened.” She gave a shy smile.

“Are you in pain?” Roy asked.

“No, not at all. That’s strange isn’t it? I mean look at it, it’s gone right through my foot!”

The woman seemed to be getting a bit agitated more than likely from shock, Roy deduced. He pulled his scissors from his belt and began to cut the woman’s sock off her foot as Johnny opened a link to Rampart General.

“Rampart, Squad 51.”

“Go ahead, 51,” Dixie McCall encouraged.

“Rampart, we have a female victim, age…” He looked to the woman.

“Thirty-one,” she answered.

“Age thirty-one. Victim has a knitting needle straight through the foot.”

“Do you have vitals, 51?” Rampart’s head emergency nurse asked.

“Hold for vitals, Rampart,” Johnny responded, then scooted over beside the woman to get the needed information for the hospital staff.

Meanwhile Roy had removed the woman’s sock. Gingerly, he examined the exit wound on the top of the woman’s foot right below the juncture of her big toe and the one next to it. The wound was dry, no blood draining from it at all. However, it was swollen and turning purple. He gently turned her foot slightly to get a look at the entry wound on the bottom. Again no blood, but it was starting to turn color.

“Still no pain?” he asked as he noticed Johnny reach for the biophone and transmit the vitals, along with the same observations he’d made to the wounds.

“No, it’s numb though.”

Roy looked up at Johnny to see if he had heard this tidbit and brought his attention back to the woman when he heard his partner relaying the newest piece of data.

Within twenty minutes the paramedics had the mother of two ready for transport. Johnny climbed into the back of the waiting ambulance with her and the pair was soon on their way with Gage continuing to monitor her state.

While the paramedic was retaking her blood pressure, the woman asked, “Have you ever had one of those days? You know, the kind where you wonder why you even bothered getting out of bed?”

When he was finished with his task Johnny unplugged the stethoscope from his ears and removed and wrapped the blood pressure cuff.  “Yeah,” was his one word reply.

“How do you handle them?” she asked. “I mean, maybe we should just go back to bed when we think it. You know?”

“Unfortunately, we aren’t always in a position where that’s possible. But it sure would be nice.” He smiled.

“Take today for instance. I know I set my alarm before going to bed, but it didn’t go off so I woke up late. I made a pot of coffee only to realize I forgot to put the grounds in. Then when I finally managed to make it properly, my husband poured himself a cup only to have the handle snap right off of his mug. Luckily he was okay, but his shirt and tie weren’t. He didn’t have a clean shirt so he ended up having to dig the cleanest one out of the dirty laundry basket. I plugged in my iron only to blow a fuse. When I finally got him and the kids off I thought I would be in for a peaceful rest of the day. I think there must be a full moon tonight or something.”

Johnny sat looking at the woman. As the ambulance came to a stop and the attendants opened the doors, he helped them lower the gurney to the ground and entered the building with the woman when she was wheeled into Examination Room Three. Doctor Early quickly took over and Johnny exited the room. He ambled up to the nurses’ station at the same time as Roy.

“Hey, Dix,” Roy smiled.

“Hey, Roy. I hear you guys are having one of those days.” She smiled back.

“No, no we aren’t. Just a few odd calls is all.”

“Roy, stop denying it! Even the woman with the needle through her foot realizes there’s something amiss with this day. She believes we’re going to have a full moon tonight. Remind me to look at the calendar when we get back to the station.”

Roy stared at his partner then shook his head when Johnny had finished speaking. “See you later, Dix,” was all he said before turning on his heels and walking away.

“Can you believe him? How can he possibly believe it’s an ordinary day?” Johnny whined to the head nurse before trailing after his partner.

Dixie just remained seated and didn’t say a word to either of the parting paramedics. She did however silently hope that she wouldn’t be around much if they continued to have a busy day. The last thing she needed was a John Gage type day.

 

E!E!E!E!

“You know, a full moon would explain everything,” Johnny stated, as he glanced at his partner in the driver’s seat. “Everything.”

“Just give it time. Things’ll switch around. We just got off to a different start.”

“Different? You call four weird rescues in a row different?” He let out a snorted laugh. “Roy, that’s beyond different.”

“I just want to eat,” the senior paramedic stated, not wanting to get into it again.

“I wonder what’s for lunch?”

But it looked like it was going to be awhile before they’d find out. Just three blocks from the station, dispatch sent them on yet another response.

E!E!E!E!

After three rings of the doorbell, a woman in her early forties answered, one hand over her left eye. A small open cardboard box could be seen on the kitchen table across the room behind her.

Johnny gave a very brief knowing glance toward his partner. He wondered was it something in the box or on it that was going to be the culprit. Much to his surprise, it was neither. It was part of the box. An extremely small piece had come off one of the corners as she lifted the inner flaps, and it had shot up into her eye. It was so small, that Roy could just make it out with careful examination. The tiny debris appeared to have worked its way just under the outer layer of her eye during the few times she’d attempted to remove it herself.

“Who’da thought opening a simple cardboard box could be so dangerous,” Johnny commented when they were once again on their way to the station.

“At least Brackett was optimistic that it could be removed from her eye with no permanent damage.”

The younger man nodded in agreement. “I’m still gonna check the calendar for a full moon, you know.” His remark was followed by a low grumble from his empty stomach.

E!E!E!E!

Johnny jumped out of the squad as soon as Roy brought it to a complete stop in the apparatus bay beside the engine. Without a word to his partner, who was in the process of climbing out himself, Gage hurried to the dayroom where the engine crew was already eating a lunch of tuna sandwiches and potato chips.

“Hey, glad you guys could join us,” the captain greeted. But Johnny was on his way in the opposite direction to the bulletin board, where a calendar was posted.

“I thought you said you were hungry,” Roy commented as he came in behind.

“I am,” the younger man answered, his eyes not leaving the board.

“Well, the way things are going, you’d better eat while ya can,” his partner reminded.

“I will. . .I will.”

“What’s so important about the calendar?” Chet wondered. He glanced at Roy, who had just taken a seat, but didn’t get an explanation from him. He returned his attention to the dark-haired paramedic and waited as Marco made his own inquiry.

“Yeah, Johnny, did you get a date with a nurse while you were at Rampart?”

His gaze still locked on the item of his attention, he replied, “I’m checkin’ to see if tonight’s gonna be a full moon.”

Chet looked at the others, his eyebrows raised. He then shifted his gaze to Johnny. “You’re really taking this astronomy seriously, huh?”

“When did this come about?,” Captain Stanley wondered as he sat back in his chair.

Suddenly catching up to the rest of the conversation, Johnny looked over to the table, a baffled expression on his face. “Astronomy? I’m not into astronomy,” he clarified, his hand splayed on his chest. He snorted a laugh as he gave the subject thought. “I’m just tryin’ to figure out why we’re havin’ such weird rescues. That’s all.”

Roy kept eating as the others continued with the conversation.

“Maybe that’s why you don’t know,” Chet suggested. “Maybe you need to get into astronomy then, so you’ll have an idea what’s going on and how long it’ll continue.” He looked to Roy for any sign of a reaction, but the senior paramedic didn’t seem interested in any of it. Instead, he just glanced at his partner’s still empty chair and plate, and shook his head.

“Chet, astronomy is the scientific study of stars, planets and galaxies that’re outside the earth's atmosphere. Astrology is to do with birth signs and the alignment of the stars and stuff and what’s likely gonna happen next.”

“Well, Marco said--” he cut himself off when he saw Lopez shrug.

“The thing is, it doesn’t matter ‘cause I’m not into either of ‘um,” Johnny assured.

“It can’t be a full moon tonight,” Hank suddenly recalled. “We just had one about a week and a half ago.”

Johnny tapped a knuckle on the calendar and nodded. “You’re right. Well, cross that idea off. But the lady on our next to last rescue was so sure,” he said with conviction as he made his way to the table.  “She was havin’ a worse day than us and she was so sure it was gonna be a full moon.”

“A lot of people say that when things go wrong,” Mike reminded. “Everyone knows things get weird when the moon is full.”

Johnny placed a sandwich on his plate and grabbed a handful of potato chips from a bag in the center of the table as he took a seat beside Roy. “Well, how is your day going?” he wondered, his eyes traveling from one engine crew member to the next.

“We’ve only had one run,” Marco answered. “It was for a small fire in the back part of a beauty shop.”

The others nodded in agreement.

Johnny snapped his fingers and with a big bite of sandwich stuffed in his left cheek, stated, “That’s it!” He looked to Roy, an odd smile on his face due to the food still in his mouth. “That’s it!”

“What?”

“It’s girls!” he then looked to the others. “It’s a girl thing!” He shifted his food to where he could chew it. After he swallowed and washed it down with a gulp of milk he’d poured into a glass, he explained further, “Don’tcha see? All the rescues so far’ve been women!” He sat back in his chair, the most relaxed he’d been all morning. “All this time the answer was right there. Right__ there in front of us.”

Roy rolled his eyes as the rest of the men gave it thought. He only hoped they wouldn’t encourage his partner. Before anyone had a chance to do anything, the klaxons sounded, this time sending the station out for an unknown type rescue.

E!E!E!E!

Once at the scene, the captain had his three engine crew members wait by the rig while he, Roy and Johnny went up to the front door of a one-story red brick home with a gray roof and small porch facing the street. After a couple of knocks, a man in his late sixties answered.

“I sure hope you can help us.”

“What seems to be the problem?” Hank asked.

“It’s our cat.”

The captain glanced at his paramedics before questioning, “Cat?”

“Yes, sir. Marybelle. She’s my wife’s baby since our kids have all grown up and moved out on their own.”

“What happened? Is she stuck up a tree?” It appeared this was going to be a routine call until the man shook his head and couldn’t give a clear answer.

“I think you’re going to have to see this one to understand it.”

The three men once again exchanged glances. Hank motioned for the engine crew to stay put and followed the man and paramedics inside. They walked through a livingroom and into the kitchen where a small model of a fire station sat in the middle of the table, the lower half of an orange tabby cat sticking out from the front opening where the apparatus bay door would be. Muffled cries of meows could be heard from the piece. A woman also in her late sixties was standing near the counter dabbing at her tear-filled eyes.

“Can you please get my Marybelle free?” she asked.

The men stepped closer and bent down around the exposed end of the cat, their hands resting on their thighs. It looked like the body had barely fit through the hole. Johnny was the first to stand up straight.

“I thought cats only went through openings that were at least wide enough for  their whiskers to fit,” the youngest crew member commented. “If it was big enough that she could get in, she oughta be able to back out.”

The man shook his head. “She’s stuck. Isn’t she, Marcia.”

His wife nodded. “Dick’s right. She’s really stuck.”

Hank looked around the outer edges of the hole. It did look like the cat was wedged in pretty good. “How’d she get in that far?”

“With a lot of determination,” Dick offered. “I’m building this model of a fire station for my son Mark, and I just left to have a cigarette out on the back patio. I came back inside and the cat was wriggling her way in till she suddenly stopped. Wouldn’t move. And she’s been like that since.”

“Kinda looks like what it’d be for us if we were in one of Chet’s B-horror flicks, doesn’t it?” Johnny quietly remarked to Roy. “Attack of the Colossal Cat.”

Roy shook his head, but couldn’t help smirking a little. “Have you tried coaxing her out?”

Dick nodded. “Yes, sir. But have you ever tried to talk to that end of a cat?”

“I. . .uh. . .I guess not.”

Johnny and Hank grinned.

“Well, whata we do?” Gage wondered. “I mean, we could use Vaseline, but their gonna have a heck of a time bathin’ the cat to get it off.” He almost could imagine another rescue at the address if they did.

“Do you have any canned tuna?” Roy wondered. It looked like lunch was going to pay off if his idea worked.

Marcia opened a cupboard and nodded. “Yes, why?”

“Well, what happens with Marybelle every time you open one?”

“Oh, as soon as she hears the can opener, she comes charging into the kitchen.”

The look on his face said the rest. It was certainly worth a try. If Marybelle had the will to get in the little fire station despite the tight fit, then it would take an even greater one to get her to wriggle out. Tuna could just be the incentive she needed.

Marcia did as suggested. The human spectators watched as the cat wriggled, Johnny finally reaching out and pulling slightly to help. Soon the orange tabby was free and in search of the tuna reward. She was uninjured, just her fur out of sorts from the tight squeeze out.

“I wish we’d thought of that,” Dick said as he shook his head in disbelief.

Johnny peered closer at the cat-free model. “You know, this is really cute, You oughta build more of these and sellum.”

“Only be sure your cat’s not hanging around close if you do,” Hank added with a grin.

E!E!E!E!

Dick walked with the men to the front door. “I’m sorry to have made you come all the way over here for this.”

“That’s okay,” Hank said.

“Yeah,” Johnny emphasized. “Besides, with the way today is goin’, believe me, this was gonna happen whether it was you or someone else.” He looked to Roy for a response, but didn’t get much other than an eye roll.

“That was good thinking on the tuna,” the captain commented. “But since you don’t own a cat, how’d you think of that?”

“Our dog does the same thing. She hears the can opener in use and there’s no stopping her. That and I want to finish my tuna sandwich back at the station. I had to think of something.”

Hank and Johnny snickered at the comment.

E!E!E!E!

Soon the men were on their way. Johnny turned in his seat in the squad to face Roy.

“So now do you admit we’re having one weird call after another? And it was a girl again!”

“It was a cat.”

“But it was a girl cat. A female.”

“I think you’re lookin’ too hard for a reason.”

“Ah ha! So you do agree it’s been a morning full of strange stuff!” He couldn’t contain his excitement.

“I didn’t say that.”

“But you did in a sense. You just don’t realize it yet.”

Roy gave it thought as he kept his eyes on the traffic ahead. “I think I’m gonna plead the fifth on that.”

Johnny just shifted in his seat to face forward, a smug grin on his face. He was so sure he’d figured out the reason for the weird calls that the other didn’t matter as much to him anymore anyway. But the grin quickly faded as he recalled that knowing the cause didn't mean the strange runs were going to come to an end.

 

E!E!E!E!

The engine and squad backed into the bay. The men were still discussing the previous rescue as they each poured a cup of coffee and took a seat. They were sitting and enjoying the brew while the paramedics finally were able to finish their lunch. It wasn't often they were called out to actually rescue a cat despite the mythology of firemen always rescuing cats from trees.

"I tell ya it really is odd," added Chet. "Maybe Gage is right. Chicks can have some strange things happen to them."

Roy was not happy with that comment. "Just coincidence Chet, nothing more." He really wanted this to stop. As if it wasn't bad enough to have his own partner go on about this; now with Chet piping up it would be worse.

Hank could sense that this subject was a sore one with his senior medic and felt he should step in and intervene. "Once you all are done with your coffee, I have some reports I could use help with." The captain looked each and every man in the eye as he stood up to take his cup to the sink. "That is, unless you have some work of your own to do?"

The men got the hint that it was time to stop chatting and get busy. No one liked paperwork and if Hank was threatening them with it, they were either in trouble or on his last nerve. The men didn't really want to know which was the case.

Shortly after 2pm the klaxons sounded sending the squad on yet another unknown type rescue. Roy sincerely hoped it was something normal. The squad arrived at an apartment building on Center Avenue. They were met in the lobby by a short, heavyset older woman.

"You here from the fire department?"

"Yes, ma’am," answered Roy. "I'm Roy and this is my partner John. What seems to be the trouble?"

"Upstairs in apartment 4C. Such a nice young man. Him and his wife. Both nice kids really. Anyway, nice but a little loopy if you know what I mean," she laughed. At the quizzical looks on the paramedics faces she replied, "Sorry. I'm Betty, the super here. I've known these kids since they moved in last year as newlyweds. Adam’s wife Melinda is out of town visiting her parents, and he has a job interview so he was ironing his shirt and well . . . I'll let you judge for yourselves."

She inserted her key in the master override and they stepped into the elevator. Once on the fourth floor, the stout woman led them to apartment 4C. Once inside they saw Adam sitting on the sofa holding a dish towel full of ice to his chest. He was in obvious distress.

"Adam, the paramedics are here. Do you want me to wait around or will you be all right?"

"Thanks, Betty. I think I'll be all right. Just make sure the door is locked and give Melinda a call for me okay?"

"Sure thing, hon. You fellas take good care of him." Betty left the apartment talking to herself, "Such a nice kid. Really is a shame."

Johnny set the equipment on the floor and proceeded to remove the towel full of ice cubes. There was a sizeable burn on the man's chest in the shape of an iron.

"Roy, we have a second degree burn here. Probably going to need to be seen at Rampart." There was a large red blistered area of skin. "How are you feeling, Adam?"

"A little woozy actually. Hurts like heck too. It's really embarrassing you know? My wife's going to think I've lost my mind but I was in a hurry and I thought maybe I could just get a few wrinkles out and save some time. You know?"

Johnny proceeded to take vitals which he relayed to Roy while Vince Howard, from the LAPD, got the patient's information for the report. Roy relayed the vitals and wound information to Rampart via the biophone.

Once the burn was treated and the patient was loaded on the gurney, Adam exclaimed, "From now on I think I'm going to let her do all the ironing or I'll just live with the wrinkles!"

The paramedics laughed along with him. "Sounds like a good idea, Adam," added Johnny.

Betty had returned to say goodbye and lock the apartment for the young man. "Call me if you need a ride home, hon."

E!E!E!E!

Roy followed the ambulance to the hospital and while waiting for his partner had a chance to talk to Dixie.

"Day getting any better? On your last trip in, Johnny was still bugged about something."

"When isn't he?" Roy laughed. "Yeah, long day with a lot of weird calls and he insists they are related somehow."

She smiled at the senior paramedic. "Well bad luck does seem to run in streaks."

"Not you too," said Roy shaking his head.

"Just making an observation. I'm not taking sides."

Johnny came out of the treatment room shaking his head.

"What?" asked Roy.

"Can you believe that? Tried to iron his shirt while wearing it. Now you can't tell me that today isn't full of strange calls. I mean, what are the odds?"

"I think it's time to head back to the station. We're supposed to make supper remember?" He was trying to distract his partner.

"Yeah, okay. Hey, Dix." With that statement Johnny froze.

"Penny for your thoughts," offered the head nurse.

"It was a guy this time."

"Okay, it was a guy and?"

"Up until now, they've all been chicks! I was sure that was the connection. Now we get a guy and his accident was weird too. Huh."

"C'mon, Johnny. We need to go. Bye, Dix."

"Bye, guys."

"Oh, uh, bye, Dix. Roy? You just have to admit it's weird," he said trailing after his rapidly retreating partner. In the squad, Johnny looked at Roy. "It is weird. Sooner or later you hafta quit denyin’ it.”

Roy sighed. "Yeah, if you'll stop going on and on about it, it is weird. Now can we just worry about what we're making for supper?" His tone told the younger man that his partner was still out of sorts and maybe Johnny should stop, for now. With their streak of odd ball calls involving women seemingly ended, he really couldn't think of much else to say.

"So, what are we making for supper?"

E!E!E!E!

The engine crew had another call to an out of control garbage fire and the squad was called out to yet another unknown type rescue. They had been called to a woman with her finger stuck in her kitchen drain. She had dropped her ring in the sink and while trying to keep it from going all the way down ended up jamming her finger into the drain and having it stuck. She didn't require a trip to the hospital but Johnny mentally added her to the list of freakish rescues they had that day. He wanted to say something to Roy about it but after his deal with his partner earlier, he thought better of it.

Backing the squad into the station Roy was glad his partner appeared to be thinking of things other than the rescues of the day. He and Johnny went into the kitchen to finish prepping the vegetables for supper. While Roy browned the meat and started the soup, Johnny made the salad. The engine crew joined them in the dayroom after hanging hose to dry and cleaning up the engine and themselves.

"Smells good, Roy. Guess Gage didn't help you much."

"Har har, Chet. Not very funny today are you?"

"I see he let you make the salad. Seems harmless enough."

Chet tried to get Gage to bite but he seemed preoccupied. Without a sparring partner the potential battle lost it's appeal. He stuck his hands in his pockets and sulked over to the sofa and sat next to Henry. He was soon engaged in chatting with the dog and giving him some much needed attention. Roy was glad that Chet found other things to do than irritate Johnny.

It wasn't long before the crew was dining on vegetable beef soup, a fresh garden salad, and warm buttered rolls. No further calls were received allowing the men to relax and enjoy their meal. After supper the dishes were washed and put away and they settled in to watch a little television.

E!E!E!E!

Seated on a chair he’d pulled away from the table, Johnny watched the television with disinterest while Captain Stanley, Marco and Mike were absorbed in the suspenseful movie of the week from their chairs nearby. More a fan of low budget old horror movies, Chet sat on the couch across the room, his head tipped back and his eyes closed. Henry the dog was nestled up alongside him, his head in Chet’s lap.

Roy was in front of the stove, in the process of refilling a bowl with popcorn, when he noticed Johnny suddenly sit forward in interest when a theory for the strange goings on in the film was being discussed by two characters. But Gage sat back just as quickly when the exchange didn’t come close to fitting their situation.

Suddenly the tones sounded and the squad was sent out on a call for a woman injured. Johnny and the captain rushed for the apparatus bay, while Roy handed off the bowl of popcorn to Marco and followed right behind.

Once Hank acknowledged the call and gave the slip of paper with the information to his paramedics, they were on their way.

E!E!E!E!

Less than five minutes later, Johnny and Roy were at the address of the call. They climbed out of the squad parked at the curb behind a police squad car and scanned the building in front of them for apartment number 120. It was dark outside, well past sunset, but the outdoor lights illuminated the numbers on each of the doors.

“Must be around the corner that way,” Gage commented, with a motion of his hand. They grabbed what equipment they thought they’d need and trotted across the lawn and down the sidewalk to their left.

When they came around the end of the building, they saw a gray canister vacuum sitting outside the door of the apartment they’d been looking for. The men exchanged a shrug, then Roy knocked on the door with his free hand. Right away it opened, revealing a young lady about nineteen years old and dressed in a short sleeved pale green nightgown that ended at her ankles, her bare feet displaying neatly painted toenails.

“Wow, that was fast!” she remarked, obviously not bothered to be caught in her casual attire. “I just called you guys.”

“We try to be prompt,” Roy answered with a smile.

As she led them into the kitchen after explaining it was regarding her roommate, Johnny questioned, “Do you ladies know there’s a vacuum outside your door?”

“Yeah. That’s ours.”

“Okay, just wonderin’.” If that’s where they kept it and it stayed there, who was he to question? It was just another oddity in a not-so-normal day. In fact, the more he thought about it as they stepped into the kitchen, the more he realized that if it was in a closet like most people’s it would seem even more out of place.

The victim was another young lady who also appeared to be in her late teens. She was sitting on the floor, her back against a cupboard door and dressed in light-weight pink pajamas and socks on her feet.

The police officer at the scene stood from where he’d been squatted down beside her and allowed the paramedics to take over.

“What happened?” Roy asked as he squatted down where the other had just been.

“The spider dance.”

Johnny had kneeled on the floor and looked up at the first girl in surprise. “The what?”

“Spider dance. You know, a person finds a spider hanging down on some web when they nearly walk into it. They start flippin’ out and steppin’ all over the place.”

“Oh that.”

She nodded toward Johnny. “Uh huh. And when you got socks on--”

“Amanda,” her friend groaned. “Do ya hafta tell ‘em everything?”

“We get it,” Roy assured. He then went on to assess the girl while Johnny relayed the information to Rampart. She’d smacked her head on the corner of the kitchen table on her way down, along with hitting her left elbow hard upon landing. Though she hadn’t lost consciouness, the bump on the back of her head implied it had been a rather solid hit; her arm was extremely sore. She’d need to be taken to Rampart for x-rays, treatment and observation at least until morning. 

Once she was ready to transport and in the ambulance with Roy, Johnny closed the doors and gave them two slaps to signal they were secure. The emergency vehicle departed right before the police officer did the same in his cruiser.

Yet to leave, Johnny turned to address Amanda. She was standing on the sidewalk still in her nightgown and amongst several local residents who’d gather to see why the fire department was at their location.

“You. . .uh. . . may wanna change,” he said as he motioned at her gown, “before you head to Rampart.”

She looked down and for the first time realized she hadn’t been properly dressed. The girl gave a slightly embarrassed laugh. “I guess so.”

As she headed around the corner, he called out, “So why do you keep your vacuum outside anyway?”

Amanda turned around and explained, “We sucked the spider up in it! It’s gonna stay there till we’re sure he’s dead!”

Johnny just nodded and gave a quick wave. He turned and hurried toward the squad. Girls.

E!E!E!E!

When Gage got to Rampart, Roy was already with Dixie, having dropped off the victim with Morton.

“Well, we were beginning to think you’d be the next strange call,” Dixie joked.

“Not if I can help it.” He turned to Roy. “How’s she doin’?”

“She should be able to go home early tomorrow, barring any unexpected complications.”

“Good deal. Hey, you’ll never guess why their vacuum was outside.”

“The spider was in it.”

Johnny just gave him a blank stare. After a brief pause, he commented, “She told you.”

Roy nodded. “I had to explain we couldn’t go back and change the  vacuum bag.”

The younger man shook his head. But he wisely kept the rest of his thoughts private. He could just as easily rant to himself and spare his partner. . .for now.

E!E!E!E!

“You had the chance to go play the hero and offer to change one lousy vacuum bag for a couple of single chicks and you let it go?” Chet asked Johnny in amazement.

“It’s not our job.”

“Were they ugly?”

The paramedic screwed up his face in irritation. “No!”

Chet carefully mannuevered Henry aside, then got up from his seat on the couch and approached Gage, who was leaning against the counter near the sink. “I can understand Roy here,” he said, indicating the other paramedic who was sitting at the table, a glass of milk in front of him, “not caring one way or another. But you! Man, you had a moment of opportunity handed right to ya and what did you do? Ya let it go. Let it slip right through your fingers. Those very fingers that could’ve easily changed one vacuum cleaner bag.”

Johnny pursed his lips, then spoke. “All right, all right! Look, I think you’re forgettin’ somethin’. One girl was injured and probably the last thing on her mind was givin’ out a phone number. And the other went to Rampart to see ‘er. Her, Chet. Not me, not Roy. Her roommate.”

“What ever you say, Johnny boy,” he said with a shake of his head.

“’Sides, they’re just part of this oddball shift we’re havin’ anyway. It’d probably be askin’ for trouble to hook up with one of ‘em.”

“Have you figured out why you’re getting all these weird calls yet?” Marco wondered from his chair a few feet in front of the TV.

After giving a quick glance at Roy, Johnny answered with a shake of his head. “No. I was thinkin’ maybe it was tied into everything being unknown rescues, but not all of ‘em have been that.”

“How’re things at the hospital?” Hank asked. “Any strange goings on there? Besides the ones you bring in, I mean,” he added with an amused grin.

Roy shrugged. “Only Morton seemed worried about it earlier, but they haven’t had anything out of the norm all day. In fact, Dixie said she’d take one just to make things more interesting while she’s still there.”

“Go figure,” Johnny said with a snorted laugh. “We’ve been tryin’ to figure out how to get outta this pattern, and she wants in it.”

“Maybe you can do some kind of traditional magical Indian dance and pass the ‘curse’ on.”

“Chet!”

“I think I hear my bed calling me,” the mustached fireman stated as he quickly ducked from the room.

“With any luck it’ll tell him to go play in the street,” Gage muttered with sarcasm.

When they heard the sudden screech of tires from out in front of the station several seconds later, Johnny looked at the others like he’d just seen a ghost. They all froze in place for a second before rushing out to see what they hoped wouldn’t be Chet Kelly laid out on the pavement.

All five men breathed a sigh of relief when it turned out to be nothing but a near fender bender and no pedestrian involved. Johnny looked at the others.

“If I’d’ve said that any other time, nothin’ like this would’ve happened. Guarantee it.”

E!E!E!E!

Now in bed, Johnny propped himself up on his left forearm and eyed his partner in the bunk across from his.

“Hey, Roy?”

The older man remained on his back, his eyes closed. “Yeah?”

“I wonder if any of the other guys are havin’ a shift like ours. The times we saw any other paramedics at Rampart, we didn’t ask.”

“Nope.”

“Because somebody wouldn’t admit we were havin’ one of those kind of shifts,” Gage added.

Roy opened one eye and looked at him, then closed it again. “Maybe we won’t have anymore runs tonight and it won’t matter.”

Just then the lights came on as the tones sounded.

“You were saying?” Johnny commented as they scrambled out of bed. They pulled up their turnout pants and with boots on ran for the apparatus bay, the captain on his way as well to acknowledge the call.

Chet laid back down and glanced at Marco in the next bunk over. “If this keeps up all night, I think I know what the cause of their strange calls is.”

“What?”

“Them. It’s the only explanation.”

Marco pondered the comment, wondering if it even made sense.

E!E!E!E!

The squad responded to a new apartment complex several blocks from the hospital. It was a five story building consisting of three wings with a central core. The well lit entrance was a welcome sight for the paramedics at this time of night, even with another police officer on hand in the event he was needed. The men gathered their equipment and headed for the building. Johnny hit the buzzer to gain entrance to the security door.

A slightly balding man who looked about fifty unlocked the door and allowed them inside. "Good evening gentlemen and what brings you here at this hour?" he asked. The man looked as if he had been sound asleep a few minutes ago.

"We got a call for apartment 512." Roy responded, looking around to see if there was an elevator here in the main lobby.

"512 you say?" He looked puzzled at first and then as if a light went on inside his head. Snapping his fingers he said, "Marta and Erin. Two really nice young ladies who keep rather odd hours if I do say. Marta would have just gotten home about an hour ago. Her roommate works the late shift. I do hope she's all right." The man ushered them towards the far corner where the elevator doors were.

"Hopefully it's nothing serious," Roy said trying to ease the man's concern. "We'll know more when we get up there."

The man nodded as the elevator doors opened. "Well, I'll wait down here to let you all out. Don't want to be underfoot. If you need assistance, just hit the red button on the panel by the front door. It's an emergency button that rings right here at the main switchboard. There's one in every apartment. Name's Bob. Bob Anderson. I'm the Super."

They thanked the man and hit the button for the fifth floor. Although tired, the adrenalin was now flowing and they were ready for the next suffering citizen. Johnny punched the doorbell for apartment 512 and a voice beckoned then inside.

"C'mon in," a female voice called out. There on the floor in the kitchen entryway was a slightly full-figured girl of about twenty-five. She was sitting, holding her left ankle with a yellow kitchen towel wrapped around her right hand. Roy set up the bio-phone while Johnny got to work assessing the injured young lady.

"Are you Marta?" the younger paramedic asked.

"Um, yeah," she answered. There were tears in her eyes but the surprised look on her face caused Johnny to smile. "How'd you know my name?"

"Your Super let us in and he told us. Nice man. He's worried about you."

"That would be Bob. He's a really great guy. He fixes everything right the first time and he's always there if you need to talk about stuff. Makes this place a lot more like home. Know what I mean?"

Gage nodded and finished checking her very swollen ankle. It was already bruising. "Hard to tell if this is just a bad sprain or something more with all this swelling. You're going to need to have it x-rayed to be sure. How about your hand? What's going on here?"

"Oh, you guys are going to think I'm a real klutz or something. I just got home from work and was fixing myself something to eat. Since I always work this shift, I'm used to eating at this time of night. Well, I was trying to catch this movie while cutting some fruit and I kinda cut my hand instead. Darn thing slipped while I was peeling it." She pointed to the apple on the floor and the butter knife laying beside it. There was blood on both of them. Johnny gently unwrapped the towel from her hand to find the cut still bleeding. "Who'da thought a butter knife could do that, huh? Anyway, I tripped over that stepstool after I cut myself and was trying to get to the sink to run some cold water on it. The end result is what you see here. My boss isn't going to be happy if I have to miss work. It's our busy season and I really can't afford to be out."

Johnny smiled at her and replied, "It takes a lot to surprise us, Marta. This is fairly tame considering some of the things we've seen lately. Hopefully it's not that serious and you won't be sidelined for long. So what is it you do?" He was still assessing the cut on her hand.

"Catalog production. It's time to get the entire thing set up so we can have them printed and shipped to the customers for the upcoming holiday season. All this has to be done months in advance."

Johnny nodded and turned to his partner, "She has a pretty deep cut and it's still bleeding heavily, Roy. Definitely needs stitches."

He set to work getting vitals while Roy relayed them and consulted Rampart. Since Marta's roommate would be home soon, she was sure she'd have a ride home from the hospital. Her vitals were a little unstable. The more she thought about her job and her injuries the more upset she was getting. Rampart advised them to transport.

A quick call to Erin by Marta confirmed that her roommate would pick her up and she was ready to go. Bob was waiting by the elevator doors when they arrived in the lobby. He was relieved that it wasn't anything life threatening. The Super was eager to help out and held the doors so they could maneuver the stretcher outside. He escorted them to the waiting emergency vehicle. Marta's distress was palpable and Bob did his best to put her at ease. Between the two of them, he and Johnny had her smiling again in no time.

"Keep your chin up, young lady," said Bob. "You're in good hands and everything will work out. Always does."

Roy closed the doors and gave the customary two slaps. The ambulance pulled out and Roy stowed the gear back in the squad. He couldn't help smiling as he took note of the superintendent watching until the flashing lights were no longer visible before he returned to the building. He was locking the doors when Roy pulled onto the street to follow, the officer at the scene heading in the opposite direction on another call.

E!E!E!E!

Roy waited for his partner at the nurses station. Having been more than a bit nervous, Marta had asked Johnny to stay with her. He obliged and when she calmed down, Dr. Early was able to examine her. She sheepishly thanked him for staying. Johnny rejoined his partner and both grabbed a cup of coffee before heading back to the station. They knew the rest of the crew would be asleep and this way they wouldn't wake anyone unnecessarily. The ride back to the station was quiet.

Roy backed the squad into the bay and both men wearily made their way to the dorm. As quietly as possible they settled into their beds. Each man hoping that this was indeed the end of the calls for the night or that they could at least get a couple hours sleep before the next one.

E!E!E!E!

Once again Johnny found himself staring up at the darkened ceiling while his partner seemed ready to sleep. With his hands clasped behind his head, he thought about the rescues they’d been on and what a common element might be besides a little strangeness.

There’s no such thing as the Twilight Zone except on TV and it’s not a full moon. It’s not just a girl thing. . .  He glanced at Roy. The senior paramedic had his back to him. Johnny quietly sighed and once again looked upwards, his brow furrowed. It’s not unknown rescues. So what can it be? “What is it?” he unintentionally asked out loud.

“What’d you say?” Roy asked, his voice slightly muffled since he was still facing away.

Johnny glanced over and quickly stated, “I said, it’s late, isn’t it? That’s all.”

“Yes, it is. So go to sleep.”

Gage shot a glare, then draped his left forearm across his eyes, a habit he had to help him get to sleep every night. The dorm was peaceful except for the sound of occasional snores from the other men. Suddenly the dark-haired paramedic lifted his arm off and bolted upright in one motion. With a snap of his fingers he exclaimed, “That‘s it!”

A couple of groans from across the room sounded as Roy turned over and eyed him with annoyance.

“I know what it is!” Johnny said with glee.

“Gage!”

“Sorry, Cap!” He sat silently looking straight ahead, a wide grin on his face.

“Well, don’t stop there,” Roy prodded. “You’ve got me wondering now.”

“Me too,” Chet stated. “And I don’t even know what you’re talkin’ about.”

“The weird calls, man. I know what it is. What’s causing ‘em.”

He looked at Roy who was silent but wore facial expression that demanded this get over with soon.

“Adults. It’s all adults. There’s been no kids.”

When no one argued back to disprove his theory, he settled back down into bed, a smug grin now replacing the wide one earlier. He once again draped his forearm across his eyes and remained that way. Soon deep breaths indicated he was asleep.

In the meantime, the other five crew members lay awake, wondering  if he indeed was onto something.

E!E!E!E!

Finally everyone had gotten to sleep, but in the middle of the night the klaxons sounded and the lights in the dorm came on.

“Station 51, Engine 18, house fire, 3123 West Trailridge Road, three one two three West Trailridge Road, time out 1:05.”

The men quickly put on their turnouts and hurried to their respective vehicles, the captain first acknowledging the call like before. Soon they were on their way to the address that was on the outskirts of town where there was mostly open land.

E!E!E!E!

As they drove up a long dirt driveway, the crew from Station 51 could see flames reaching up from behind a one-story ranch style home that was secluded on a four acre lot of land. Smoke billowed up into the dark sky above.

Once they came to a stop beside the house, Hank Stanley and his men scrambled out of their vehicles. “Chet, Marco, get an inch and half!”

“That’s the house fire?” Chet said out loud as he helped pull out the hose.

It was a one-roomed outhouse about a hundred feet behind the home. Or the remains of one as it continued to burn despite a man trying to put it out with the garden hose.

A lady with her hair in big rollers and dressed in green pajamas with a pink furry robe hanging open in front ran over to the captain.

“You have to get it out! Get the fire out now!” She tugged on his arm.

“That’s what we’re here for,” he said as he freed his arm. “Did anyone get hurt?”

“No. . . no.”

In the meantime, Marco and Chet turned the charged hose on the structure and soon were knocking down the flames with a powerful spray of water.

The other engine arrived to help just as a police officer pulled up as well. With an ill expression on her face, the woman mumbled, “Oh crap. This is all we need.”

Johnny sniffed the air. “Man, you smell what I smell?” he asked his partner.

Roy nodded. “I have a feeling that outhouse isn’t what it appeared to be.”

“I’d say the pot in there isn’t a toilet,” Johnny snorted in agreement.

E!E!E!E!

By the time the fire was out, it was discovered that the outhouse was not used for its orignal purpose, but rather for growing marijuana in flowerpots stuck in the holes, and bundles of the drug were stored in stacks. Two young children who lived at the home had gotten a hold of matches and hid them until the adults were asleep. After sneeking out, they went in the outhouse and accidentally set it on fire. The screams of the terrified boys as they ran from the small structure woke the others and thus the fire department was called. But they hadn’t figured on the police as well. No one had planned on a confession either, but when the two boys told what they knew, there was nothing to do but tell all and hope the law would take that into consideration and go lightly.

E!E!E!E!

With no one injured, only one outhouse destroyed, many pounds of marijuana burned up and six firemen feeling slightly happier than they did before they arrived, the crews could leave this scene with relief.

Except for one paramedic who once again was proved wrong. As he opened the squad door, Johnny looked up at the sky and stated, “You just had to bring the kids in on it, didn’t ya?”

He climbed in the passenger seat while Roy got in on the driver’s side. As the older man opened his mouth to make a comment, Gage looked at him and with determination in his voice said, “I’m gonna figure this out. One way or another, I’m gonna have the answer.”

Roy just nodded and put the truck into gear as his partner continued.

“There’s gotta be a common thread here we’re missin’. I just know there is. It’s probably so obvious, we’re gonna kick ourselves that we didn’t see it in the first place. I just don’t know what in the world it could be. I wonder. . .”

The rant went on as they headed down the street.

E!E!E!E!

Chet looked to Marco across from him as they rode back to the station while Engine 18’s crew took care of the cleanup at the scene.

“I know what’s causing their weird calls.”

“Them?”

“Nah, Roy’s off the hook. It’s Gage. That’s the only explanation.”

Marco gave it thought, then shook his head as he recalled this was Chet Kelly he was listening to.

E!E!E!E!

Roy glanced at his partner; Johnny was lying on his stomach in the next bed over, his chin resting on the back of his hand.

“We’re almost done for this shift, you know. Why don’t you just get some sleep and forget about it?”

Gage lifted his head and looked at DeSoto in surprise. “Forget about it? How can I forget about it? I keep gettin’ a reminder every time we get sent out.”

“Well if you ask me--” he stopped in mid sentence when he noticed the disinterested expression on the other’s face in the dim lighting. “Night,” he said as he rolled over, his back facing the younger man. He could spend the rest of the night trying to talk sense into his partner and get no where. No reason for both of them to be up.

Except he didn’t have a choice when the klaxons sounded, the lights came on and the squad was dispatched for another unknown rescue.

“I wonder what this one could be?” Johnny commented as they drove away from the station.

“At this time? Who knows.”

E!E!E!E!

As the paramedics climbed out of their squad at the scene and gathered their supplies, Johnny glanced over his shoulder. Standing close to the trunk of a large tree in the bright glow from a floodlight on the side of the house were an elderly man and a younger one, a lady and two children. A ladder leaned against the tall tree. His gaze shot upward as he pulled the biophone from the squad compartment with his right hand.

He could see a hint of cloth showing here and there up in the tree where there were wide gaps bwtween leaves; two feet with red tennis shoes were visible where they rested on a branch.

Once they had their equipment, they trotted over to where the fortyish-looking woman was waving them on. A police officer arrived at the scene and followed behind.

When they got to the trunk of the tree, Gage and DeSoto peered upwards. There in the middle of the leaf-covered branches was a woman who looked to be in her late seventies at the youngest.

“I’m sorry,” the other woman stated. “But we had to call you. She refused to come down until she was sure there’d be witnesses.”

“Witnesses?” Johnny asked.

The younger man, who also appeared to be in his forties, nodded. “That’s right. Because she knows she’s in trouble when she gets down here.”

“Jump, gramma!” a little boy encouraged. “Jump!”

“Yeah,” another agreed. “Da firemans are here. Jump!”

Johnny glanced at his partner. “I can’t wait to hear the story to this.”

They soon learned the grandma was an eloping bride to be, the love of her life waiting with the others. The idea anyone would climb out their bedroom window and into a tree to sneak away from a home to elope didn’t surprise Johnny or Roy, but the fact she turned out to be eigthy-two did. Her seventy-year-old boyfriend had been the other surprise. The ‘bad younger influence’, as her daughter and son-in-law had stated.

But she’d been a spry eighty-two year old; very full of spirit. And she’d been more than cooperative when it came time for Roy to help her down from the tree.

“Just take it easy, I’m right here with ya,” he assured.

“I trust you,” she firmly stated. “it’s them I’m worried about.” She indicated her relatives below.

The suitcase she’d borrowed of her own accord was one her son-in-law used on business trips. When he saw her about to hand it to Roy at the paramedic’s request, he called out, “Be careful with that! It cost me enough!”

The elderly lady had paused in mid hand-over, chewed her lower lip a moment, then let it drop with an extra bit of force.

Unfortunatley Johnny was near the bottom of the ladder looking at the son-in-law at the time. He didn’t see the incoming object. The dark-haired paramedic found himself down for the count and dazed.

When his partner got to his side, Gage mumbled, “We've gotta. . .get to the . . .bottom of these. . .calls.” With that, he winced and gave a slight wave to the other faces peering down at him in concern.

E!E!E!E!

Five o’clock in the morning, the paramedics finally arrived back at the station. As they headed for the dorm, Gage gently touched the bump on the top of his head.

Roy glanced at the motion. “At least you’re okay enough to be cleared for duty.”

With a scowl came, “I wouldn’t necessarily say that’s a good thing, Roy.”

“You mean you’d rather be in the hospital?”

All he got for an answer was a ‘what do you think?’ look.

E!E!E!E!

“What was it this time?” Chet whispered as the two entered the dorm. Unable to sleep, he’d been talking quietly with Marco who was in the next bed over.

“An eloping couple,” Roy answered.

“That’s not so unusual,” Marco commented.

But when Johnny told them the ages, they began to concede it was a little strange. When Roy told them the blushing bride-to-be dropped a suitcase from a tree and onto his parther, sending him to the hospital in need of medical care, Chet simply said to Marco, “I told ya.”

E!E!E!E!

At seven o-clock the morning tones sounded. Roy rubbed at his eyes, then glanced at the bed next to his.

“Don’t look now,” he said to his partner. “But we’re almost out of here.”

“Shhh. Not while we’ve got an hou--”

Johnny groaned when the alarm tones went off and dispatch sent them out for their last call of the shift.

“Man, Roy, did ya hafta do tht again? Just watch. . .now this is gonna be the strangest run yet.”

Having overheard the comments, Chet shook his head as he watched the two hurry by. “I guess it was Roy all along.”

 

E!E!E!E!

Roy pulled the squad up in front of a moderate size ranch style house and stopped. The yard was neatly landscaped and the grass had recently been cut. A large sugar maple stood in the middle of it with a ring of red rose bushes growing proudly around it's base. It was obvious to anyone passing by that the owners took great pride in their property. The paramedics collected their gear and approached the house. Adrenaline had kicked in and erased any signs that the previous day had been both long and eventful.

Johnny rang the doorbell. A petite blonde woman of about fifty answered the door. "Oh do come in. It's my husband. I'm so worried about him!"

She ushered them in and closed the large oak door. The inside of the house was as neatly kept as the outside. The walls were covered in family photos and the color scheme was both warm and inviting. This wasn't just a house, this was a home.

"What seems to be the problem, Mrs. - " Roy started to ask.

"Maddie. please call me Maddie," she interrupted. "It's my husband. He's complaining of pains, in his chest. He is having some trouble breathing too. I told him not to do all that yard work yesterday. I know he overexerted himself."

"Where is he, Mrs. - "

"Maddie."

"Where is he, Maddie?"

The distressed woman showed them to the kitchen where a man with greying hair and a slim build sat at the table. He was an odd shade of pale that was almost grey. The man was sweating and holding his left arm to his side.

"Hi, Mr. - "

"RJ, everyone calls me RJ," he replied weakly.

"Okay, RJ. What's going on here?" Johnny asked as he pulled out the blood pressure cuff and stethoscope. "Your wife says you're having some pain?"

The man swallowed and nodded. "Yeah. Woke me up. Hurt like blazes too. It scared me. Then I started having trouble catching my breath. Felt kinda weak, ya know? And a little nauseous."

Johnny released the valve on the cuff and read the numbers out to Roy who jotted them down. "Can you describe the pain for us, RJ?"

As Johnny continued to assess the patient, Roy set up the biophone and connection with Rampart.

"It felt like someone was sitting on my chest. Kind of squashing the air out of me. Took my breath away."

"Do you know what time that was?"

"It was around 5:00AM. It let up for a while. Thought maybe it was from all that work I did outside yesterday but it feels different somehow."

"Still feeling it now?"

"Yeah, some. Arm still hurts too."

"What does that pain feel like?"

"Kinda like a toothache. Mostly dull but it twinges too."

After Johnny gave Roy the rest of the vitals the senior paramedic called Rampart. Orders were given to get an EKG and transmit a strip as well as set up an IV. While Johnny prepped the patient and put the leads on, Roy gathered the rest of the information needed from Maddie. He asked her to repeat a few things and went outside to get the oxygen tank from the squad. Once the leads were in place and hooked up to the machine, an EKG was sent to the hospital.

While the paramedics waited for the strip to be read and to receive orders from the hospital they set up the IV. It wasn't long before the voice of Dr. Brackett boomed across to them to start the IV and give the patient oxygen. A few moments later he gave them further orders to add some medications to the IV drip.

Maddie nervously paced as they worked to help her husband. "Is he - Is he going to be all right?" she asked Roy.

He smiled at her. "We're doing everything we can for him. We'll be taking him to Rampart and he'll be getting the best care possible." He hoped he was reassuring her.

"It's his heart, isn't it?"

"I'm not a doctor but yes, he is having some difficulty. You called us and that allows us to start helping him now. The earlier treatment is started, the better the chances for a complete recovery or that any further problems can be lessened or avoided. It makes a world of difference."

"I know but the thought of losing him is so -"

Roy placed a hand on her shoulder. "It's going to be all right. We got to him in time. Have faith. He'll be at the hospital soon and that's the best place for him to be."

Johnny transmitted a second strip. Hospital protocol dictated a second reading once medications had been administered. Once the second reading was reviewed, they were given the go ahead to transport the patient. Too involved with the rescue to think about it’s normalcy, the dark-haired paramedic just chatted as he would with any other patient as they loaded RJ into the ambulance. Maddie rode up front with the driver. On the way to the hospital RJ was dispensing gardening tips which made his wife smile. If he was talking 'shop' he was feeling at the very least, a tiny bit better. Roy stowed the equipment and followed in the squad.

E!E!E!E!

Roy waited patiently at the base station, drinking coffee while his partner finished up in the treatment room. Dixie exited another room and greeted the paramedic warmly.

"So how goes it? Anything else odd happen to you guys?"

"You have no idea. I'll just be glad we can go home after this."

"Was it really that bad or just -"

"Put it this way, Dix," Roy sighed, "It had it's moments. Not all of them were from the calls either."

The nurse chuckled as she looked over the paperwork on her desk. She picked up an EKG strip sitting near the base radio. It was one of several lying by the receiver.

"Your patient I suppose?"

"Yeah. Possible MI."

He then handed her the requisition for the supplies they used on this run. She did a double take when she looked at the name on the slip. "Does this say what I think it does?"

Roy merely nodded.

"Not 'the' Rod Serling, is it?"

"No, just a really really weird coincidence." He stacked the supplies in a small cardboard box.

Johnny exited the treatment room looking completely exhausted. "Hey, Dix," he said as he helped himself to some coffee and yawned.

"Hi, Johnny."

Gage stared off into space as he sipped at his coffee.

"I take it all is well?"

"Yeah. RJ is going to be okay. And other than a headache I think I'm okay too."

"Headache?"

"Long story," Roy nodded in agreement, trying not to encourage his partner to recount that last rescue.

Dixie was perplexed. "I just figured you'd have had more to say about your latest patient."

"You mean RJ?"

"RJ?" she queried.

"He doesn't know," answered Roy.

"What?" curiosity gaining his interest and his attention.

Roy sighed. "Our patient."

"Yeah?" he inquired. He wondered what it was that Roy had not told him.

"His name is -"

"RJ."

"His full name is Rod. Rod," Roy hesitated before finishing. "Serling." He knew it was going to be a long ride home when his partner's eyes widened and he snapped his fingers.

"I 'knew' it, Roy! Didn't I tell ya? All those weird calls. I 'knew' it! It really was a Twilight Zone kinda thing!" He suddenly looked perplexed. "No wait, this call wasn't weird. Nothing about it was weird. It was completely normal. That can't be. ALL our calls were weird this shift. We just can't end like this! There's got to be another one, Roy. Something even weirder. It's just - . It just can't end like this!"

"What's wrong with a normal call? They happen more often than the weird ones. Besides they weren't all that weird. Face it, the shift is over and they weren't all strange."

Johnny finished his coffee and tossed the cup in the trash. Shaking his head he said, "I'm tellin' ya, Roy, it just can't end like this! Weird calls all shift and a normal one at the end? It's not right. No way. I swear, we're gonna have another one before we get back. I just don't understand it. And they were too weird ones. How can you deny that?" Johnny headed quickly for the doors. He paused long enough to call out, "You comin', Roy? Bye, Dix!"

Roy groaned and followed his partner. "It's going to be a long ride home. A long ride indeed."

Dixie laughed and started sorting through the pile of papers needing filed on the desk. Feeling more than a bit sorry for Roy, she was extremely glad 'she' didn't have to ride back to the station with Johnny right now.

E!E!E!E!

Johnny went on nonstop all the way back to the station about how this couldn't be their last call. Roy wondered how his partner could talk so much and not run out of breath. He was really looking forward to his two days off.

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