Letters To Santa

 

Choose one or two of the E! Characters and imagine them as an 8-year old child.  It is Christmas Eve and they are writing their letter to Santa. What would their letter say?  Then have Santa reply back! (This idea courtesy of Pam).

 

 

Pam:

 

Dear Papa of Pudginess-

How are you and the Mrs. doing?  I have been a very good boy this year.

I would like a slingshot, a water gun and camouflaged pants and shirt.

I left you some fudge.  I hope you like it.

From, Chet


Dear Chet-

Thank you for the fudge, but it was not very nice to glue it to the plate.

You're quite the little prankster, aren't you?  You have been good this

year so I left you the slingshot.  I've also left you a windshield repair kit.

Love, Santa

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Mr. Kringle,

I hope this letter finds you and your wife well.  Please give my fondest
regards to the reindeer.  I have left you some delicious homemade cookies
and low-fat milk.  I have also left your reindeer some organically grown
corn.  I have been very good this year so I would appreciate receiving
everything on my list:

New galoshes
A sweater
A chemistry set
I would also like something for fun -- A set of medical encyclopedias.

Sincerely, Brice

P.S.  I have often wondered in this economy how you can afford to only work
one night a year?



Dear Brice,

Thank you for the milk and cookies.  I also appreciate your wrapping the
cookies in saran wrap so I could take them to go.  Unfortunately, I didn't
notice the saran wrap until I had already taken a bite.

As always, you have been very good this year so I've left you the chemistry
set and encyclopedias.  As for your question concerning my financial
security, Mrs. Claus and I have made some wise investments so we are
financially independent.

Love, Santa

 

 

 

 

Dear Santa,

I have been a very good boy this year.  I am captain of my softball and
soccer teams. Sometimes the boys fight with each other and I get mad at them
because I have to make them stop fighting.  Do your elves ever fight Santa?

For Christmas this year I want a punching bag.  My mom says she thinks I
need it. I don't really understand why.  She said something about stress. 
Could you also leave me some chew toys for my guinea pigs, Twit and Pal?

I left you some coffee and cookies.  I hope you like them.

Thanks Santa.

Love,

Hank




Dear Hank,

I have been watching you this year and you certainly do a good job as
captain of your sports teams.  Your mom is right, you do need the punching
bag.  I've also left you a "Soothing Sounds of Nature" 8-track tape.  It
might help with the stress your mom is talking about.  Yes Hank, my elves do
fight but when they do I punish them by making them clean the workshop
bathroom.  They hate that, but it seems to work.

Thanks for the coffee.  A cup would have been just fine, but it was nice of
you to leave me the pot.

Love, Santa

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Santa Claus,

I have been very good this year.  Especially when I was in the hospital. I
didn't even cry.

Could you please give me the presents on my list?  I would like a
trampoline, a ramp for my bike, and a boomerang.

Thanks, Santa.  I hope you can read my letter.  I'm writing with my left
hand because I broke my right hand when I fell out of the tree trying to
rescue my neighbor's cat.

Love, Johnny




Dear Johnny,

Santa was sorry to see you go into the emergency room...Again.

I'm leaving you the ramp for your bike.  I've also left you a helmet, elbow
pads, wrist guards and shin guards.

I'm also leaving you a few crossword puzzles.  They are fun to do when you
and your parents are in the waiting room.

I'm sorry Johnny, but in good conscience I can't leave you the boomerang or
trampoline.  Santa doesn't want to have to increase his liability insurance.

  Ho Ho Ho!

Take care Johnny, and be careful.

Love,

Santa

 

 

 

 

            

 

 

 

 

Charmi:

 

Dear Santa,

All I want for Christmas is a BIG RED firetruck.  I mean a BIG one.  And RED
- real,real RED.  If it had working gauges and tanks that I could hook up to
the garden hose, that would be even better. And a flashing light.  It has to
have a flashing light. And a siren.

Love, Mikey Stoker

 

Dear Mikey,

Another firetruck?  That's what you wanted last year.  And each of the 3
years before that.  Okay, my little firefighting friend, if that's what you
want, that's what you'll get.  But one day, when you're a grown man, you will
have to ask the Commissioner for a new BIG RED firetruck.  I don't think
Santa's going to be able to keep up with your growing requests!

Love, Santa  

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Santa,

Are you real?  My uncle Lone Wolf says you're not.  I think you are.  Mom and
Dad always said you were real.  I don't care what Lone Wolf says.  I think
you're real.  I don't need anything this year even though I have tried real
hard to be good.  I'm sorry about that little accident with Sheila.  I didn't
mean to spill the whole bucket of paint on her.  I hope you don't count that.
 Anyway, I just wanted to know if you are real.

Love, Johnny...

PS  Can you tell me about the legend of the mistletoe?



Dear Johnny,

Oh, precious child.  Look into your heart.  If you see me, I am real. 
Anytime you see someone or something in your heart, it is real.  Always
believe that.  Yes, Johnny, there is a Santa for I do live in your heart.

Christmas is not just about what you need, little one.  You said you didn't
need anything but you didn't tell me what you want.  Since you have tried to
be good (although Sheila said in her note that you weren't a very good boy at
all), I am going to bring you a bridle for your new little colt.  And, I'm
going to bring you a big red firetruck.

Love, Santa...

PS Wait 'til you're older!

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Santa,

I have a long list this year but it's really, really important.  I need - I
mean I want - a couple buckets, some nails, some string, a couple springs,
maybe some wood (cut in small sections), and some balloons.  And, yeah, a
stepladder too.  Oh, a hammer, I need - I mean I want - a hammer.

Thanks!

Love, Chet

 


Dear Chet,

You are going to be quite the little builder, aren't you?!  I think Santa can
arrange to supply your little workshop.  Have fun!

Love, Santa...

P.S. Are you going to have a party?  Oh well, not important.  If you want
balloons, you'll get balloons.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Querido Santa,

You know how hard my Mama always works.  There's always so much to do around
the house.  Well, I'm 8 years old now, Santa.  Mama calls me her little
hombre now - not her little chico like she used to.  If I'm the little man of
the house, I need to help out.  Will you please bring me something to let me
help my Mama?  And, will you please bring her some really pretty pink
slippers?

Gracias, Marco

 


Querido Marco,

Claro que si - of course! - I will bring your Mama some pretty pink slippers.
 I will even bring her a matching robe.  Now, let's see...something to help
your Mama out...hmmm.  I'll bring you some nice pots and pans, some spices,
and an LA County Firemen's Cookbook.  They have some really good recipes. 
And, the recipes make a lot because the firemen are always hungry - you'll be
able to feed all of your cousins and help your Mama out a lot.  Be sure to
make the chili for your Mama - I think she'll like it.

Feliz Navidad, hombre Marco!

Te amo, Santa  

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Santa,

Will you please bring me a new LA Dodgers baseball cap?  The tall, skinny kid
that just moved in around the corner set mine on fire!  Can you believe
that?!  I hope you bring that jerk some coal cuz that's what me made out of
my nice cap.  Jerk.  Anyway, if they have one that's flame retardant, you
might want to bring that one.

Thanks, Santa. Merry Christmas!

'Mac' McConnikee





Dear Mac,

Ha Ha Ha!  Ho Ho Ho!  Oh, little Mac, you make Santa laugh.  I don't think
they make flame retardant baseball caps!  I see your problem though.  How
about if I bring you a nice new Dodgers baseball cap and a matching helmet? 
Then, when little Henry Stanley is out playing, you can wear your helmet. 
The helmet won't burn - I promise you that.  As for little Henry getting some
coal, well, he will get his share of that.  I think I'll also give him a
firetruck.  If he's going to start fires, he'll have to learn about putting
them out.

Love, Santa

 

 

 

            

 

 

 

 

Kim:

 

While sucking on a candycane, or pencil...something
has to be in his mouth...

Dear Santa,

I have been a pretty good kid this year.  Way better
than the rest of the kids.  Anyway, I was thinking,
maybe you could bring me a lasso this year.  I have
been thinking about roping calves-it would be great
exercise.  Besides, you know, there are so many other
things you can do with a rope...knot tying and rock
climbing for instance. I hope you can do this for me,
because I have been good.

Thanks man,

Johnny Gage



Dear Johnny,

Way better than the rest--well I don't know about
that.

Somehow, I think a rope suits you.  There are many
things you can do with it besides roping calves and
rock climbing.  You can rappel down buildings to rescue
victims and use it to pull victims to the top of a
cliff for example.  I think there may be a lasso under
the tree for you this year, but please try not to talk
with your mouth full.

Santa

 

 

 

            

 

 

 

Audrey:

 

Dear Santa,

 

All I want for Christmas is a little brother I can pull around in my Red Flyer wagon and that I can call *Junior*, like my dad calls me. Also, I'd like a first aid kit, so I can bandage him up if the wagon tips over.

 

Love, Roy

 

 

 

Dear Roy,

 

You'd better ask your mom and dad about the little brother. However, I think I can manage the first aid kit. If you ever do get the little brother you want, ride him around carefully . . .you don't want *Junior* to be needing your first aid care too much!

 

Love, Santa

 

 

            

 

 

 

Kenda:

 

Deer Santa Claus,

 

    Or wood you rather be called Saint Nickelsus?   Or Father Kristmas?  Or Kris Kringle?  I don’t want to call you the wrong thing and have you mad at me, Santa Claus.  What do you want to be called?  Okay, just a minute and I will start over. 

 

 

Deer Sir,

 

    I have been very good this year xcept for that one problem I had with my homework paper that I turned in late.  But it was only late because I fell off the fence I was walking on when I was on my way to skool, and I hit my head reely hard on a rock.  I didn’t cry though.  But I coodn’t have cryed even if I wanted to, ‘cause I was unconscionable.  When I wasn’t unconscionable anymore, I woke up and I was in the hospitel.  There was a reely pretty nurse putting a bandage on my head.  I smiled at her, and she smiled back.  Then I puked on her dress.  That’s when my dad said, “Johnny Gage, I swear you need a big brother to watch out for you.”   But my dad didn’t really swear, he only said, ‘I swear,’ so please bring him a present, too, Santa Nick Father Kris Sir.  

 

    I wood like a Red Flyer wagon for Kristmas that drives reely fast.  I wood like a siren on it, too, and I want a loud horn.  My dad said I can’t have none of that stuff because he says the siren and horn will drive him nuts, and he says I’ll fall out of the wagon and kill myself.  But I’m not asking my dad, Santa Nick Father Sir, I’m asking you.  If you think I shood not have a Red Flyer wagon, then pleese give me a big brother like my dad says I need, and pleese give that big brother a Red Flyer wagon.  Maybe sometimes he’ll even let me drive it, huh?

 

Thank you, Santa Nick Father Kris Sir.

 

Your very good friend,

John Roderick Gage  - (Johnny)

 

 

 

 

Dear John Roderick Gage – (Johnny),

 

    I can tell you are a boy who wants make certain you have all the bases covered, and for that I admire your fortitude.  I’m sorry to hear you hit your head on a rock, and because of that turned your homework paper in late.   Santa’s glad you’re okay, but from now on, Johnny, stay off of fences.

 

    Santa doesn’t have a big brother in his bag of treasures this year, but Santa knows that someday, you’ll get that big brother you’ve been wanting.  With faith, all things are possible, Johnny.  Remember that.

 

    Unfortunately, Santa agrees with your dad.  You’ll kill yourself if you have a Red Flyer wagon.  How about a nice set of Lincoln Logs instead?  And Santa sees that you also need a dictionary.  I’ll put those things on my list for you, Johnny, and find a few other toys in my workshop that I’m sure you’ll like.

 

    You be a good boy, and Santa will see you on Christmas Eve.  Oh, and about your request regarding your big brother letting you drive – I wouldn’t count on it, kid.

 

 

Love,

Santa Nick Father Kris Sir