THE RHYMING PRANKSTER
by LaJuan
Over months they begin showing up throughout the Fire Department. Some came in office mail addressed to the individuals. Others showed up on beds, desks, and kitchen tables in the firehouses. Some were found in the engines and squads on the men's seats. They brought smiles and lightened the load of exhaustion that dogged the steps of the firemen at the infernos. Even some of the office clerks at the downtown fire department found they were targets. The Chief had no immunity when he spotted his in his office chair.
Rumor was rampant. Who was this Rhyming Prankster? How was he able to leave these snippets of paper without being found?
Johnny and Chet decided to track down the man. It was the topic of their conversation anytime the two came together. The rest of the crew grew weary of their constant chatter, whether it was in the firehouse or on a run. This lasted through two shifts.
Johnny rushed into the locker room running late. He had minutes to get dressed and into the line-up for daily chores. As he jerked open his locker door, out fluttered a typed piece of paper. Picking it up, he read what was written:
He priddles and prattles
A rebuttal is a battle.
Johnny looked around to see if anyone else was nearby and found he was alone. He quickly got dressed and ran into the bay holding the poem just as Captain Stanley bellowed out "Roll Call."
"Nice to see you, Pal."
"Thanks, Cap."
"What are you holding, Johnny?"
Johnny just looked at his Captain and handed the poem over.
After reading, Captain Stanley's lips twitched and broke into a grin. Addressing his men, he read the poem.
As the men chuckled, Captain Stanley told them to be on alert, the Rhyming Prankster had struck Station 51. He gave out assignments, reminded Marco that he was out of uniform, and sent his men on their way.
They went into the kitchen to grab coffee before they started their work. A box of pastries was on the counter and they scrambled to get one. Everyone got something to eat except Marco. He had ducked into the dorm to get his badge. Coming into the room he glanced around and saw the evidence of crumbs. Turning he left the room muttering in Spanish. He went back to his locker to get the wrapped Honey Bun he had stashed the previous week. Opening the door, he spied the Danish on the top shelf in a plate. Propped up against the plate was a piece of paper.
He mutters in Spanish
When he's denied the last Danish.
Laughing loudly, he brought his prize and poem back to the kitchen and showed it to Captain Stanley. "Well, it looks like this prankster has a heart. Enjoy your Danish, Marco." Grinning, Captain Stanley left to begin his never-ending paperwork.
Roy and Johnny needed supplies for the squad and went to Rampart Hospital to visit Dixie in the Emergency Room. As they came to the nurses' station, they saw similar snippets of paper attached to the bulletin board nearby. From what was written they could surmise who the poems were referring to.
Forever with a frown
Black hair is your crown.
"That has to be Brackett."
Regal and Blonde
Firefighters and Doctors you bond.
With a grin Roy named Dixie as the regal blonde.
With grandfather ways and easy smile
For you, we will wait for awhile.
"Without a doubt, Junior, that has to be Joe Early."
Gage irritates for kicks
Oil and water does not mix.
"Hey, that one's about me!"
"Well, who around here do you irritate?"
With a half-cocked grin Johnny responded, "Morton."
"Sounds like you got that right, Johnny. I bet Roy would have figured that one out with his eyes shut." Dixie had walked up behind her favorite paramedics as they were gazing at the bulletin board. "They have been showing up the last couple of days. Kel found his on his desk. Joe found his in the doctor's break room. Mine was taped to the base station and Morton won't tell us where he found his."
"Probably taped to his back side."
"Now Johnny. Be nice."
"It's difficult Dixie."
"So, it looks like the Fire Department's Rhyming Prankster has made a house call to Rampart," observed Roy.
"Roy, I wonder where he or she is going to strike next?" Johnny queried.
"I believe they said that every station except 51 had been hit and Johnny and Marco got it this morning."
"Really? Johnny, what did yours say?"
"Dixie, I would rather not say."
"They pegged Johnny right on the nose."
"Roy!" whined Johnny as he absently rubbed his nose. "Maybe we need to get supplies before we are called out." Just then their handy talkie came alive with their special tone sending them off on a run.
"See you Dix." Johnny echoed Roy's parting comments as they ran out the door.
Two runs later, the guys had been able to pick up their supplies and were backing the squad into the apparatus bay. As Johnny got out of the squad the heavenly scent of Mike's fried chicken assaulted his nose. Like a bull being led by a nose ring, Johnny had a bliss look by the time he hit the kitchen door. "Ah, Mike. How much longer?"
Knowing just what Johnny wanted, Mike waved him to the table. As Johnny scrambled to get to his chair among his co-workers, Roy strolled into the kitchen. Rather than going to the table, he headed for the cabinet with the coffee cups. Reaching up, he pulled down two cups, took them to the coffeepot and glanced into one of the cups. He pulled a sliver of a paper out, read it, shook his head and grinned.
"Hey partner. What do you have in your hand?"
"My fortune, Junior."
"Hand it over Pal while you get the coffee."
Roy passed the paper to Captain Stanley and returned to the coffeepot. He poured the coffee and brought the cups back to the table to Johnny. Captain Stanley read the poem to his crew.
He grins and shakes his head
As Junior begs to be fed.
The firemen chuckled as they threw a knowing glance at Roy. His face turned a glowing pink as he blushed.
"Ah, Cap. I don't beg." That statement from Johnny brought laughter to the crew.
Mike set the chicken down into the middle of the table and all thoughts of the Rhyming Prankster were lost to the appeal of fried chicken.
As Johnny and Roy cleaned the dishes after their meal, they heard Chet hollering from the dayroom. Glancing at each other they headed to the ruckus to find out what was going on.
"He's been here while we ate. I know he has. How else could this be taped to the couch? It wasn't here when we went to eat." Chet was dancing around holding the paper above his head. Mike calmly strolled over and with his added height, easily snatched the paper from Chet.
"Give it here, Mike." After reading it, Mike gave it to Captain Stanley.
Glancing at it, Cap broke out in a large grin and said, "Rightly so."
Puzzled, Marco, Johnny and Roy frowned at the scene as Cap cleared his throat to read.
He claims the couch as his throne
Accepting as his right a bone.
As if in agreement, Henry barked from the couch, laid his head down and closed his eyes.
"I think we should follow 'his majesty's' example and get ready to sleep. Finish up the dishes guys and let's hit the bunks." The men agreed with their Captain's suggestion and Roy and Johnny hurried to finish their chore.
The night was quiet until the klaxon went off at 1:30 am sending the station out for a trash bin fire. As they went to get into the engine, Mike saw a piece of paper in his driver's seat. Picking it up, he slid into the seat and was ready to go as Captain Stanley swung up into his shotgun position. Noticing the paper, Captain Stanley snatched it from Mike's fingers as he made the right turn out of the apparatus bay. Grabbing a flashlight, he read the note out loud as they traveled to the fire.
He's tall and quiet
And keeps his lips sealed tight.
"Well, Mike, he's got you figured out. I wonder who this guy is and how he knows everybody so well? Also, how is he getting into the stations so easily?"
"Hey Cap. Maybe he's a ghost and just floats through the wall."
The remark earned Chet 'the look' from his Captain. Putting up his hands, Chet said, "I know. Latrine duty for a week."
"So nice of you to read my mind."
Mike and Marco chuckled over the exchange.
The crew made short work of putting out the fire and quickly returned to the station and their bunks. They found Roy and Johnny sound asleep. Quietly they got their boots and turnouts ready and went to bed. The rest of the night was uneventful and the klaxon went off with the wakeup tone the next morning. Marco was on his side facing Chet's bunk when the tone sounded. His eyes popped open and were followed quickly with giggles. That brought the rest of the guys over to see what was going on. Taped to the wall above Chet was
He snores and roars.
Escape is through the dorm door.
"I think I'm starting to like this guy. He's pulled a prank on the prankster."
"Shut up, Gage."
"Ah, Chet. You can dish it out but you can't take it? You were snoring so much that the Rhyming Prankster was able to climb over you to tape his poem and you never woke up. I think this is a very good prank."
"Cap?" whined Chet.
"Lay off, Gage. Shift will end shortly and we won't worry about the pranksters until next shift." Everyone noticed that the Captain had included Chet in his list of pranksters.
"Okay Cap."
As they gathered in the kitchen awaiting the B shift to filter in, the B shift Captain came out of the office waving a piece of paper. "Hank, this was on the desk. I think it was meant for you."
Hank Stanley took the paper, knowing full well that he was the last of Station 51 A shift to get a poem. He read out loud to his men.
Captain is full of wit
He calls his men twits.
"Well, I'm glad whoever he is, he recognizes my good talents." With laughter and grins on their faces, his crew left to enjoy their days off.
At the next shift it was obvious that Roy was not his calm self. He couldn't stand still during roll call and got Captain Stanley's attention. "Roy, is something wrong?"
"No Cap."
"Then why the nervousness, Pal?"
"Just excitement Cap. Joanne discovered the identity of the Rhyming Prankster this weekend."
"What? You know? How did she do it? Who is it?"
Surrounded by the questions from his teammates, Roy held up his hands. "If I can get something from my locker, Cap, I'll show you."
"Go ahead Roy. We'll wait."
Soon Roy returned holding a book in his hand. Holding it up, everyone could see the title and the author. Poems from the Firestation by Michael Stoker.
"Mike??"
"I did it out of boredom. My publisher thought it would be good publicity to treat everyone to their poem before it came out."
"Come on pal. Let's call the Chief."
"I already did Cap. He okayed it as long as half the proceeds go to the Widow's Fund and he gets introduced to my publisher."
"Introduced to your publisher?"
"He wants his poems published."
"He writes poetry?"
"Well you got to admit. It's been more fun than knitting." With that statement, Mike grinned and headed to the dorm to begin his chores.
"Hey Mike. How did you get the poems into all the stations?"
Mike turned back to look at Chet and grinned. Turning he again headed for the dorm.
"Chet, remember his poem?"
"Somewhat."
"Well I do and let me quote. He's tall and quiet. And keeps his lips sealed tight."
"For once you are right Gage. He won't tell. Hey, Roy. Where did Joanne buy that book? I got to get my own copy and see what he said about Brice."
"Yeah, me too."
Special note:
The Widow's Fund got a very large donation that year from the book proceeds and the Chief's book was published the next year.
