Serendipity

  Part 11

Roy was glad for the two days off in a row; a large part of it was because he didn’t have to be around Wesley. After he had thoroughly chewed Adams out in the squad yesterday, Wesley had been quiet and reserved for the rest of the day, and had left Roy alone. A tiny part of Roy felt guilty for coming down so hard on the man, but all he had to do was think about the Wes’s deception and lies, and the harm they had done to himself and Johnny, and he would grow angry again.

Roy and Joanne finally got to spend some quiet time together that day while Eileen grocery shopped and ran errands. When Joanne announced that she had made plans with Doreen for a future Friday night to get together as a foursome, he immediately bristled and a stern ‘no’ escaped his lips. Joanne had stared at her husband with a rather hurt and confused expression on her face, and Roy finally deemed it was the necessary time to inform his wife of everything that had been going on with Wesley Adams.

Joanne was shocked to find out what Doreen had told Cindy in the bathroom, and even more mortified to find out that Heather told Johnny of the conversation. She felt so badly that she wanted Roy to take her to the hospital to see Johnny immediately, so that they could set the record straight, and tell him what had been going on. Roy assured her that he intended to do just that, but wanted to wait a little while until Johnny was feeling better. While no one was more anxious than Roy to make sure that Johnny understood that what Heather had overheard and told him were lies, it was a lot to lay on his friend, and he wanted to make sure Johnny could handle the information. Not only that, but he knew Johnny would worry once he found out about the harassment. Johnny already had an awful lot of his own problems to deal with, without having to worry about Roy’s on top of them.

By the time Roy finished explaining everything to Joanne, she was so upset and angry that she could barely speak. She was angry that she had been deceived by Doreen, who had acted the devoted friend, but who had done wicked things to promote her husband’s jealous agenda. She was angry at how Johnny had been hurt, and terribly distressed that Wes’s actions had not only caused Johnny to resign, but also had managed to put a wedge in a longtime friendship. But she was the most angry at what Wesley Adams had been putting her husband through. The stress and humiliation his harassment had caused Roy sickened her. She knew why Roy hadn’t told her about it, but couldn’t help but admonish him a little about it.

When the shock wore off a little, the two of them began to talk about what Roy would do if Wesley remained at 51, and together they came up with a few ideas. Roy mentioned his solution of trying to find a position somewhere at another station where perhaps he and Johnny could go together as a team. Joanne liked that idea, although she lamented that Roy would never be as happy anywhere else as he had been at 51’s. He reminded her that he had worked at other stations in the past, and that he knew he would never be at 51’s forever anyway. Joanne also suggested that Roy think about taking the Engineer’s exam again. After all, if he was considering leaving 51, then maybe a fresh start with an entirely new position would be in order. Roy said he would think about it, but the most important thing would be getting away from Wesley. He hoped things would be clearer after a few days. Maybe Johnny would recover his vision and then the two of them could talk about a new partnership together somewhere else. It would be good for both of them. Johnny would need work now that he had given his money away, and not only that, he needed something meaningful in his life now that he had lost so much.

When the kids came home from school, Roy and Joanne sat them both down and explained to them that they wouldn’t be spending any more time with Wesley and Doreen Adams, or their children. It wasn’t easy to explain, and they kept it brief and without too many details, but in the end, the kids understood and actually seemed relieved. When Chris said, “That’s okay, Dad, we don’t like going over there much anyway,” Roy and Joanne stared at each other in surprise.

“You don’t?” Joanne had asked.

“No,” Jennifer responded, then scrunched up his nose. “They’re…weird, Mom. And Andrew and Patty are kind of mean and they’re always fighting. They never let us play what we wanna play.”

“And Mr. Adams is mean to Mrs. Adams all the time. He even hit her once. We really didn’t like being over there anyway.”

Joanne’s mouth dropped open in astonishment. “Why didn’t you ever tell us?”

“Well,” Chris answered, “you and Mrs. Adams are really good friends, and so is Dad and Mr. Adams, well, we just didn’t wanna mess that up.”

Joanne reached out and hugged her children, telling them they never would have to play with friends that were mean to them just because their parents were friends. Both parents gave a sigh of relief when their conversation was through and were glad that they wouldn’t be spending any more time with the Adams. Joanne had grown to like Doreen, and a part of her was sad to lose that friendship, but like Roy, Doreen had become increasingly possessive and clingy; Joanne was getting tired of the woman calling her night and day. It seemed both the Adams had a problem.

That day, the DeSoto family enjoyed just being together as a family, grateful for each other.

                                                ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Dixie sat in the chair by Johnny’s bed and read to him. She had been there two days ago and started the book, and Johnny had seemed to enjoy it. So, she brought it back, hoping to take his mind off his problems for a little while.

To him, it was better than the strained conversations he seemed to have with other visitors. After all, what was there to talk about? The reality of his life was too painful to even think about, and making small talk with well-meaning friends seemed too difficult. Even though he couldn’t see them, he could tell his friends were uncomfortable around him too, feeling like they were walking on eggshells for fear that any subject they brought up would only remind Johnny of the things he had lost.

The drone of Dixie’s voice wavered in the background as he lay with his eyes closed. He knew he wouldn’t remember some of what was going on in the book tomorrow, but he didn’t really care. For now, it was a distraction from reality, and just having Dixie there sitting next to him, hearing her calming voice, and smelling the sweet subtle scent of her perfume, was comforting. Even though the pain from the surgery had become less severe over the last day or so, somehow when she was there, his headache seemed to ease up even more.

Roy poked his head in the door and surveyed the situation. Johnny looked relaxed and asleep, lying in bed, while Dixie sat next to him, reading softly. Johnny looked about the same as he had yesterday when Roy had come to see him.

She turned when she sensed Roy’s presence, offering him a smile.

“Hi, Dix,” Roy greeted softly.

“Hey, Roy.” She reached for a bookmark and closed the book, then stretched her back, grimacing, and whispered, “I think these chairs are even worse than the ones at Rampart.”

“I know what you mean,” he answered in an equally soft tone. “It took my back all day to recover the day after his surgery.”

Dixie chuckled. She gestured to another chair in the corner of the room. “Pull up a chair, Roy. He’s been sleeping quite awhile, he’ll probably wake up soon.”

He looked at her curiously. “Why are you reading if he’s not listening?”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Because this is one of my favorite books, and I can’t put it down. Besides, I think he just likes to hear my voice.”

“Yeah,” Roy said sadly. “Any change?”

She shook her head, and Roy went to fetch the chair.

The brief interruption of their voices made Johnny stir, when deep in his subconscious he detected a change. When the chair Roy was quietly trying to drag over bumped into the neighboring bed with a thud, Johnny startled, opening his eyes.

Dixie smiled at him as he blinked a few times, and it seemed like such a natural reaction that she didn’t notice at first how his eyes seemed to settle on her. “Hey, handsome. You woke up.”

Johnny was groggy and cleared his throat, his eyes glued to her sweater. “Hey, Dix?”

“What, Johnny?”

“You got a spot on your sweater.”

Dixie reflexively looked down to the spot Johnny’s eyes seemed to be staring at, and Roy did a double take from across the room. Her eyes focused on the piece of black fuzz stuck to her yellow cardigan, and she picked it off. She looked up at him, smiling, as she flicked it away. “Just some lint; thanks Jo….” Her eyes grew wide and her mouth dropped open as she stared at Johnny. His face seemed to register a shocked surprise as well as their eyes locked. “Johnny!” She stood up and leaned over his bed. “You saw the lint on my sweater!”

His eyes followed hers and he suddenly realized he could see her. His hands flew to his eyes and he was so shocked all he could stutter out was a weak, “D-Dix…”

Roy flew to the side of the bed, his face erupting in a joyous smile, while he watched the two of them.

“Johnny, can you see me?” Dixie asked desperately.

Johnny instinctively reached up to touch her face and smoothed a trembling hand over her cheek. Softly, as if in awe, he said, “I never noticed….how beautiful your eyes were before, Dix.”

She closed them for a moment, and with a relieved cry, lunged for the man in the bed to gather him up in a hug. His arms wrapped around her as well, and they held each other tightly for several seconds.

Roy bit his lip as he witnessed the exchange, tears of happiness building unbidden in his eyes. When Dixie and Johnny separated, he moved closer to the bed, and Johnny saw him standing there. An emotional smile formed on Johnny’s lips as he looked up at his friend and saw the raw feelings exposed on his face. “Roy,” he choked out, not able to say more at the moment. The regaining of his vision was so overwhelming he could barely speak. Roy abandoned the chair and instead sat on the edge of the bed next to Johnny. In a rare display of outward affection, Roy reached out to offer Johnny a brief hug, planting a few heartfelt thumps on his back before releasing him. A huge smile erupted on his face. “I told you you’d get your vision back!”

Johnny rolled his eyes and smiled. It was the first time he had done so genuinely in what seemed like ages. “Roy, not only are ya bossy, but you’re a know-it-all.”

Roy laughed, and the two exchanged a few gentle boxing hits.

After that, there was a flurry of activity as the doctor was called in to examine Johnny. It was determined that the vision was mostly in his right eye; when he closed it, they discovered he was still almost blind in his left, but the doctor thought that with time, it too, would resolve. Johnny’s vision wasn’t as sharp as it had been, but just to be able to see something – anything – was welcome.

Roy was happy when he strolled into work the next day. He’d called everyone he knew to tell them about Johnny regaining his vision, except Chet. He hadn’t been able to get a hold of the Irishman.

Wesley had come and gone, quickly changing his clothes with only a short greeting to Roy, while Roy finished getting ready in the dorm, waiting for Chet to arrive. Roy didn’t detect the well-concealed nervousness from Wesley; the other paramedic didn’t give him much of a chance. He was out the door before Roy barely had a chance to see his face.

Roy heard a small commotion as Marco and Chet’s mixed voices drew nearer, and he heard them come through the door from the engine bay. It sounded like they were arguing, and Marco was saying something in an irritated tone of voice to Chet.

“Chet, would you just stop a minute and let me see.”

“Marco, would’ja leave me alone? I told ya I was all right. Now, c’mon; I gotta get changed or I’m gonna be late.”

“Chet, you should have stayed home,” Roy heard Marco admonish.

Roy stood up as he saw Chet emerge through the row of lockers. Chet’s forehead bore a large white bandage and black and blue bruises were seeping out from under it. Chet’s left eye was already consumed in a nasty blue halo.

“What happened to you?” Roy asked in surprise.

Chet grimaced and opened his locker door. “My stupid van, that’s what happened. That piece of junk almost killed me.”

“Why? What happened?”

“My brakes failed.”

The hairs on the back of Roy’s neck stood up, and his eyes widened in alarm. “What?”

Chet sighed and slumped down onto the bench in front of his locker, pulling his shoes and socks off. “I was driving to Cindy’s house yesterday. I noticed on the way home that my brakes were a little stiff, but I thought they were all right. Well, on the way to Cindy’s, they went out completely. I was coming up to a light, and I couldn’t stop. I ran into the back end of a guy in a brand new Cadillac.”

Roy walked over in concern. “Are you all right? I take it you went to the hospital.”

“Yeah, I’m all right. But I thought the guy in the Cadillac was gonna kill me. Luckily I had seatbelts installed in my van a few years ago, and I had it on. Cindy’s been bugging me to wear it lately. My head still hit the windshield though.”

Roy scrutinized Chet’s forehead. “That looks pretty serious, Chet. Do you have a concussion?”

“Nah. I just cut myself and managed to get a big bruise, which has only succeeded in making me look like half a raccoon. But otherwise, I’m fine.”

“Chet, why don’t you go home,” Marco argued. “The Cap can find a replacement.”

“Marco, I’m already taking days off next week. I can’t take any more off this week.”

Marco shook his head.

“You sure you’re all right to work?” Roy asked in concern. “Did the doctor clear you? Who did you see?”

“Dr. Morton. And yeah, he cleared me. Said to just put ice on it every few hours, so that’s what I’ve been doing.”

“You? Or Cindy?” Marco smiled at him.

Chet smiled. “Cindy, of course. She’s an amazing chick, Roy. She met me at Rampart, drove me home, then nursed my head and treated me like a baby the rest of the evening. It was almost worth it.”

“Yeah, I bet you played it for all it was worth, amigo.”

“You better believe it,” Chet grinned. “Learned from the master himself.”

“Who?” Marco’s face broke out in a smile as he realized who Chet was referring to. “Johnny?”

“Yep. Who else has got more experience than him in milking sympathy from women over injuries?”

“You got a point there, Chet.” Marco smiled, crossing his arms.

Roy’s face lit up, and he forgot about the failed brakes for a moment in order to tell Chet about Johnny. “Oh, hey, Chet! I was trying to get a hold of you yesterday. I’ve got some great news about Johnny.”

“Oh, yeah?” Chet brightened, not bothering to hide the fact that he was truly glad to hear some positive news about his friend.

“Yeah. I was there at the hospital yesterday, and Johnny got his vision back!”

“Oh yeah? That’s great, Roy! Man, I’m really glad for him. I was worried about him, you know, all that talk about dying and everything.”

“Yeah, well, I think this is gonna help a lot, Chet.” Roy went on to explain how it happened, and the fact that his vision was only back in one eye so far, but that the doctors were optimistic that he would regain it completely.

As the day went on, Chet seemed to be fine, but a growing sense of foul play began to build in Roy’s mind. They didn’t yet know all the particulars; Chet’s van was in the shop now since it had been wrecked, and he was now waiting for an insurance claim adjuster to determine if it was totaled or repairable. It might be awhile before they found out exactly what caused the problem. The body shop had surmised a brake fluid leak, which seemed logical, except that it had been less than a year since Chet had had a brake job on his vehicle. Roy kept his dark thoughts to himself, not wanting to upset Chet without having any concrete facts to base his fears on. Roy kept trying to talk himself out of suspecting that Wesley could have had anything to do with it, his trusting nature not willing to believe that the man would stoop so low as to actually try to cause harm to someone he didn’t like. But the nagging feeling in the back of Roy’s mind wouldn’t go away. He wasn’t comfortable looking at Wesley long enough to determine if he had a guilty look about him, and by the end of the day, Roy finally convinced himself that he was overreacting to his paranoia about working with the man. Wesley might be a little unbalanced and insecure and annoying, but he wouldn’t be capable of trying to kill someone, would he?

Several days passed, and Chet’s accident was mostly forgotten; things seemed to be settling down. Wesley kept to himself, trying his best not to be confrontational, in the hopes of regaining Roy’s friendship. He knew it might take awhile, but he figured maybe if he started fresh, Roy might be able to overlook his earlier discrepancies. Roy, too, had seemed to cool down a bit, his cold attitude had waned slightly, and as long as Wesley didn’t commit any errors, Roy seemed civil toward him. Maybe there was hope for them yet.

He was alarmed that his little plan to cause a fatal accident for Chet had failed, and that Kelly was still planning on taking his Vegas trip in a few days. He couldn’t let that happen, and racked his brain trying to think of ways to get rid of the Irishman before he discovered information that would ruin everything for him.

Other than worrying about Chet, everything seemed to be going smoothly for Wesley until one evening during dinner when they were all sitting around the table and the conversation turned to Johnny. Roy mentioned that he had spoken to Dr. Early, and that Dr. Jensen had informed him that Johnny would be able to leave the hospital any day. Johnny’s vision had improved significantly since the day Roy was there with Dixie, and barring any other complications, Roy told them all he would be released soon. Talk turned to questions about where Johnny would go, since his house was gone, his boat was wrecked, and he’d broken up with Heather, and Roy mentioned that he was going to talk to Johnny about staying with him. Everyone thought that was a good idea, until Johnny could get back on his feet again. During that conversation, Wesley’s stomach twisted so severely he actually felt bile rising in his throat, and almost needed to leave the table. He felt like he would nearly explode from the jealousy and hatred building inside, and as his blood pressure rose, he kept his head bent over his food, refusing to let anyone see his face. At that moment, he wanted to kill John Gage even more than he wanted to kill Chet Kelly. The thought of the good-looking fireman actually living under DeSoto’s roof was almost too much to bear.

                                                ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Johnny sat in the chair by the window, resting his head on his fist, and stared out onto the vast sea of cars parked in Century Pavilion’s parking lot. He felt really tired. Although the return of his vision had brought a temporary brightening of his spirits, the dark thundercloud of depression plaguing him a few days ago had returned and now hovered over him. Like a fly caught in a spider’s web, he felt like a poison had been injected into him, paralyzing him.

He hated feeling this way. He had absolutely no desire to do anything. He didn’t feel like eating, or going anywhere, or talking to anyone, or doing anything. Sleep seemed to be the only thing that brought reprieve from his desolation, and even then his dreams were filled with reminders of his shattered life.

He could remember feeling this way only one other time in his life, and that was after the death of both of his parents. But he had been younger then, and more resilient; he’d had his whole life in front of him then. Now it seemed like too great an effort to pick up and start over again.

The doctor had been by to inform him that he would be released soon, but thinking about where he would go after he left the hospital felt daunting. His home was gone, the boat was wrecked, he and Heather were through, and he didn’t feel comfortable enough with Roy to ask to stay there. Besides, Joanne was recovering from a serious injury as well, and he would be a burden. He thought about asking Chet, but in the end, decided that a hotel would be his best solution. Preferring to stay alone, it would allow him his privacy and prevent him from having to talk to others. Johnny figured he could stay at a hotel, and in the meantime, he could look for an apartment to live in. After that, he didn’t know what he would do. He needed to do something about his house, his car, and his boat, but didn’t possess the motivation to follow through. Fortunately, he had enough money to get along without working for a while, but some day he would have to do something about income. Hopefully, by then, he’d be out of his funk and be able to motivate himself to go find a job. He sighed, realizing that in his mind he had just planned the steps he needed to take, thankful that he wasn’t so far gone that he was incapable of even doing that. Closing his eyes in a tired sigh, he supposed that life would go on, and he would just have to go along for the ride. It would be forced though, like being carried down a river by a current, and letting that current take him wherever it decided. As he sat there by the window, his fist slid up to support his forehead, and his head drooped downward, the fatigue caused by the depression causing him to nod off.

Footsteps in the room jarred him awake. He wasn’t sure how long he had been sitting there asleep in the chair by the window, but the sun was lower in the sky now than it had been when he’d last looked outside. Blearily, his eyes focused on his visitor, who offered a hesitant smile and a ‘hello’.

When Roy saw that Johnny was awake, he walked over to him and sat down in the other chair by the window. Reaching forward, he handed Johnny a paper bag that he’d brought. “Here.”

“What’s this?” Johnny asked groggily.

“Chocolate malt.”

Johnny looked up at Roy and raised his eyebrow at him.

“Thought you might enjoy a little treat. I know the hospital food gets old.”

“You can say that again. They don’t have orange jello here either.”

Roy chuckled and gestured toward the creamy beverage. “Drink up; you could use it. You look like you’re losin’ a little weight.”

Johnny ‘hmph’ed and rather begrudgingly took the ice cream drink out of the paper bag. After shoving the straw in through the hole in the top of the cup, he looked up at Roy. “Thanks,” he said in a monotone voice.

“You’re welcome.” Roy watched him drink for a while, then when it was obvious no conversation would be forthcoming from Johnny, he decided to start one himself. “I heard they’re gonna release you in a few days.”

Johnny looked up at Roy, his expression frozen in a bland stare.

“That’s good news, isn’t it?” Roy added cheerfully.

It was an effort, but he was able to respond correctly. “Yeah. I’ll be really glad to leave.”

Roy stared at him, taken aback by his total lack of emotion. In the past, Johnny would practically bounce off the walls when the time neared for him to be released from the hospital. He’d hoped that the regaining of his vision would have been the catalyst to raise Johnny’s spirits, but apparently, it simply hadn’t been enough. Roy rubbed at his chin, trying to think of the best way to bring up the next subject. “Johnny, have you done any thinking at all about…where you’re going to stay when you get out of here?”

Johnny glanced up at Roy over the lid of the drink; the straw slid from his mouth. “Yeah, actually, I have.”

Roy nodded. “Good. Well, I hope you thought of Joanne and I, because we’d like to have you come stay with us for awhile – ”

“No.” Johnny realized he’d answered a little too abruptly, and added, “I mean, thanks, but I can’t.”

Roy leaned back, folding his hands into his lap. He figured he knew why Johnny was resisting; it was because of that damned conversation Heather had overheard about his supposed negative feelings toward Johnny. Roy knew he had to set the record straight with John, but he hadn’t planned on doing it today; he didn’t really want to get into the whole mess about Wesley. He tried another approach albeit a weak one. “Johnny, it’s no big deal. You’ve always stayed with us before.”

Johnny smiled mirthlessly from one corner of his mouth. “Yeah, always. That’s the key word here, isn’t it? I’ve always stayed with you before. How many times has it been, Roy?” He looked up to the ceiling. “Four, five, six times maybe?”

“I don’t know.”

“My recklessness has been a burden to you enough times, Roy,” he said bitterly, emphasizing the word ‘recklessness’.

“Johnny, you’re not a burden, and you’re not reckless.”

Johnny raised an eyebrow at Roy again, as if he was challenging Roy to deny that he’d made that claim about Johnny at one time. “No? Have you seen my boat?”

“No,” Roy said quietly. “Chet said it was pretty badly damaged.”

Johnny chuckled. “That’s the understatement of the year. It’s beautiful, Roy. The mast snapped off, right at the deck. There’s a huge hole where it was. The cabin is totally destroyed.” He looked away. “I don’t understand why they bothered to bring it back, but Chet said they did.” He turned back to Roy. “Roy, I had no business going sailing that day. Heather tried to tell me not to go, but I didn’t listen to her. It was totally irresponsible. If I had had someone with me, they probably would have been killed.”

Roy leaned forward, laying his arms on the table between them. “Johnny, you had a head injury. You know as well as I do that that could have affected your judgment.”

Johnny stared down at the table.

“You’d just lost your aunt, your house, and your girlfriend. You were distraught. It wasn’t your fault.”

Johnny winced at the painful reminder of those things.

“It’s just a stupid boat, Johnny. The important thing is that you’re still here. That you survived. Johnny, come stay with Joanne and I while you recuperate. We want you there. When you get well enough to come back to work, and I know you want to come back to work, then I’ll go to headquarters with you, and we’ll get you back into the department. I haven’t quite figured out how yet, but….I want you back as my partner, Johnny.”

Johnny slammed his fist down onto the table and raised his voice in anger, the frustration and hurt he’d been feeling about Roy finally came spilling out. “Why do you keep saying that? I know you don’t want to ride with me any more, so why do you keep leading me to believe that you do? You’ve already got a partner now, Roy, one that you like better than me, and apparently one that’s also a hell of a lot less dangerous than I am! The thing I can’t figure out is, if you felt that way, then why the hell couldn’t you just be honest about it, instead of letting me find out from someone else?” Johnny stared into Roy’s face, his eyes blazing, then his gaze shifted abruptly to the table, as if he couldn’t bare to see the truth of what he’d said in Roy’s eyes.

Roy already knew that Doreen Adam’s hateful words must have had a terrible impact on Johnny when he found out, but now he got a bitter taste of the full effect of the damage she had inflicted, and it blindsided him. Finding out about it secondhand had dulled the acidity of her words. He sat frozen for a moment, barely able to look at Johnny. Finally, he spoke, trying to decide where to begin, now realizing what a huge mistake it had been to wait to tell Johnny the truth. “Johnny, you’re wrong. Nothing could be further from the truth, and if you’ll listen, I’ll tell you why.”

Johnny leaned his head into his hand and rubbed at his forehead, slowly shaking his head.

Roy reached forward and pulled his hand away, forcing John to look at him. “Johnny, I know what Doreen Adams said to Chet’s girlfriend in the bathroom that night at the spaghetti dinner, and I know Heather told you about it.”

Johnny couldn’t hold back his look of surprise. “How would you know?”

“Chet told me.”

Johnny snorted. “What, has Chet been hangin’ out in the ladies’ room lately?”

“No, his girlfriend Cindy told him, and he told me. But I didn’t know about it until just a few days ago. If I had, I would have told you a long time ago that it was all a bunch of lies. Everything Doreen said, about me and Wesley, and you, it was all a lie.”

Johnny gazed at Roy, uncertainty in his eyes, wanting to believe what Roy was saying, but afraid to. Finally, he said quietly, “I don’t understand.”

Roy drew in a deep breath and blew it out. It was time to explain everything, and much as he didn’t want to get into it all, he knew he had to in order for Johnny to understand. “Okay, I’m gonna try to explain it all to you. I didn’t want to tell you all this before, when you were really sick, but now I think you need to know.”

“Need to know what?”

“Johnny, Wesley Adams…has been trying to…sabotage our partnership, and our friendship.”

“What? Whose friendship?”

“Yours and mine.”

“Why?”

“Because he feels threatened by you.”

“Me?”

“He’s insanely jealous of you, Johnny.”

Johnny looked taken aback. “Why?” he nearly whispered.

A sick expression came over Roy’s face. “Because…” Roy sighed, closing his eyes a moment, “…Wesley wants me….and…” he looked away, biting his lower lip, feeling more nauseous the more he tried to explain what was going on. Roy pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Wants you?” Johnny looked incredulous, then his face dawned in realization. “Not…you don’t mean….”

“Yeah.”

An appalled-looking frown spread across Johnny’s face, and he unconsciously leaned backward away from the table.

Roy ran his hand through his hair nervously and leaned back in his chair lopsidedly. “Look, let me just start at the beginning.”

Johnny nodded slowly, his face frozen in disbelief. “Okay.”

Roy began to tell the story of how things were when Wesley first started filling in for Johnny, and how slowly, over time, the man began pushing himself more and more into Roy’s life. Johnny sat quietly as Roy likened Wesley to a leach, attaching himself to Roy and holding on, not letting go, how he began showing up unexpectedly at Roy’s house, inviting himself over on the pretense of helping, until finally, he was coming over after every shift, sometimes for the entire day. Roy told Johnny about Doreen, and how she had done something similar with Joanne, how both the Adams had seemed like such nice, caring people at first, until they imposed so much and so often that he and Joanne began to feel suffocated. Then, Roy got into the hard part – how Wesley’s subtle physical gestures began to get less subtle, reaching the point where Roy couldn’t even stand to be near him. Roy’s voice raised a notch and he grew more anxious as he told the story, in an almost desperate tone, as if he had to purge himself of the information. Though Roy had given Chet some of the details of the abuse he was receiving, he hadn’t gone into as much detail as he was now.

Johnny swallowed, and his eyes widened, sickened at what Roy was telling him, seeing the anguish erupt on his friend’s face that he had obviously been holding in for so long. The disgust and anger he felt as Roy described Wesley’s harassment turned to rage as Roy began ticking off all the things Wesley had done to try to ruin their friendship – the lies, the messages purposely forgotten, the obvious acts of deception born out of intense hatred and jealousy. Roy surmised that Wesley had brainwashed his abused wife into playing along with his scheme, under the pretense that this new ‘friendship’ he and Roy had was vital to his happiness, and either the woman loved him so much or her self-esteem had grown so low that she felt obligated to go along with him, lest she lose him.

When Roy finally finished, he looked tired and upset, yet his body had grown stiff with shame and humiliation. He had been staring down at the table, his hands folded together, the fingers on each nervously crossing and uncrossing, when he glanced up hesitantly at Johnny without lifting his head. He was relieved to find Johnny’s expression was one of concern and compassion.

“Why didn’t you tell me this was going on?” Johnny asked softly.

“I don’t know, Johnny. For one thing, we haven’t seen much of each other lately. Maybe I was in denial. I didn’t even tell Joanne. Hell, she was being sucked in by Doreen too. By the time I realized how bad things were, you were in the hospital. I didn’t even know you were here until three days later, and then I didn’t find out about a lot of this stuff until the day before your surgery.”

Johnny leaned back in his chair and rubbed his eyes. He felt a headache coming on. His hand came down. He sighed, searching Roy’s eyes. “What are you gonna do? Have you talked to the Cap?”

“Yeah. And there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. The Cap can’t fire Wes for not delivering phone messages, or for showing up at my house to help me with stuff.”

Johnny leaned forward angrily. “No, but he sure as hell can fire his ass for, for, for sexual harassment.”

“We’ve already talked about that, Johnny. I’ve got no proof. It would be my word against his. Besides, can you imagine the kind of publicity that would come out if I tried to sue him? You’d be dragged into it too. It could go on for years, disrupting our lives and inviting the media to treat us like zoo animals. And I’d probably lose. No, I think the only solution is for me to leave 51’s.”

“Leave?!” Johnny was astounded. “That’s not fair, Roy.”

Roy chuckled joylessly. “No one ever said life was fair, Johnny. You of all people should know that’s true.”

Johnny looked down. “Yeah,” he said quietly.

“I think my only hope is Chet.”
            “Chet? What’s he got to do with this?”

Roy shook his head. “Chet hates the guy. And he knows what’s going on now. He tried to tell me what Wes was doing a long time ago, and I didn’t listen to him. Well, Chet is gonna take a little vacation out to Vegas next week, and while he’s out there, he’s gonna just happen to make a couple of stops at some stations Adams used to work at, try to dig up some information. See, he doesn’t think the guy is playing straight either. He thinks if he can find something on him, we’ll be able to get him fired, and out of our hair.”

Johnny looked at Roy thoughtfully. “Hmm. Could work. But wouldn’t headquarters already know his history, and any past discrepancies?”

“Not necessarily. He was working out of state, and he worked at several stations, all in a short period of time. Cap didn’t seem to know very many details about him. Something happened, and Chet and I don’t think he’s being straightforward about it.” Roy thought a moment and sighed. “The only thing is, I’m not sure if Chet’ll still be able to go; his car’s in the shop; he had an accident the other day.”

“An accident?!”

“Yeah, he ran into the back end of some guy’s Cadillac at a light.”

“Was he hurt?”

“Not too bad; got a bump on the head and some bruising.”

“How’d it happen?”

Roy’s blue eyes met Johnny’s. “His brakes failed.”

They both stared at each other several seconds, both knowing they were thinking the same exact thing at the same time.

“You don’t think Adams…”

“I don’t know, Johnny. It seems kinda strange; Chet said he had his brakes done about a year ago. His car’s in the body shop now; he’s waitin’ to hear if they can fix it, and if they can determine what went wrong with the brakes. He might have a lawsuit himself if he can find fault with the job MightyBrake did; they’re the company that did his brake job last year.”

“Or, maybe the job someone else did,” Johnny said ominously.

“Yeah. I hope we’re not dealing with something like that.”

Johnny looked alarmed. “Roy, you shouldn’t be working with him.”

“Johnny, I don’t think he’s going to do anything to hurt me.”

“You don’t know that.”

“No, I don’t. Don’t worry, things seemed to have cooled down between us the last couple of days. He hasn’t done anything questionable.” Roy leaned back tiredly in his chair and stretched his arms out before bringing them down to run them through his hair. “Now that you know the facts, what do you say we talk about you coming to stay with us when you get out of here?”

Johnny leaned his head backwards, and shutting his eyes, began massaging his temples again. “Roy, it’s still not a good idea.”

“Why not?”

Johnny lowered his hands and leaned forward, slumping over the table in front of him. “Because your wife just got out of the hospital, that’s why. And you’ve got Adams harassing you. You’ve got enough to worry about. I’ll be fine in a hotel.”

Roy gave Johnny a stern look. “Johnny, you’ve got no business going and staying in a hotel alone after the kind of surgery you just had. Besides, there’s no way the doctors are gonna let you out of here if they think you’re gonna be staying alone.”

“So, I won’t tell ‘em.”

Roy sighed, deciding to try another tactic on his stubborn friend. “Listen, you’d be doing me a favor if you stayed with us.”

“How’s that?” Johnny asked skeptically.

“Eileen has to leave in two days, and Joanne will be in the house alone while the kids are at school. I’d feel better knowing you were there with her.”

“I’m not exactly in great shape right now to be taking care of your wife, Roy. And she’s certainly in no shape to take care of me.”

“You wouldn’t be taking care of her. She’s doing well on crutches right now. But if something happened, you’d be there to call for help. Johnny, I’d be grateful to you if you could.”

Johnny grimaced wryly at Roy’s skillful manipulation. He sighed. “All right.”

Roy smiled; the first time he had done so since walking in the room.

“But only for a short while. When the doc says I can drive, I’m outta there, Roy.” In all the times that Johnny had stayed at the DeSoto house while recuperating, he’d never felt uncomfortable, or that he was a burden. And even though Roy had just refuted any reason for Johnny to feel that way, he still felt a little uneasy about it. Maybe he was hesitant because he really didn’t feel like being social with anyone; he would have rather gone off alone to wallow in his despair. But at the same time, a small voice inside of him told him that right now what he needed was to be around friends. “Okay. You’ve got a deal. Maybe by then this whole mess will be cleared up.”

“I wouldn’t count on it.”

“Well then, I’m not gonna stick around 51’s any longer to wait for it to happen.”

Johnny shook his head sadly.

Roy leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, smiling slightly as he realized what he was about to say sounded just like his dark-haired partner. “I’ve got an idea.” Roy smiled again. “I think you’ll like it.”

“What?”

“I’ve been thinking that maybe you and I could go apply to work at another station together. You know, as a prepackaged team?”

Johnny’s mouth dropped open in surprise. It finally sunk in then that Roy was really sincere. “You serious?”

“Of course I’m serious. I don’t think we’d have any trouble finding a new station. After all, we’ve got our reputation to stand on….Junior.”

Johnny smiled happily and self-consciously at the same time. “I guess you’re right, Pally.” Johnny winced as a wave of pain traveled through his head, and his hand reflexively flew up to rub it.

Roy could see the lines of stress the pain was etching in Johnny’s face, and decided they’d had enough conversation for one afternoon. He stood up. “Johnny, why don’t you get back in bed and relax a while. I…probably caused your headache with all this information I just laid on you.”

Johnny continued massaging his head, but his expression relaxed some. “No. I’m glad you told me, Roy. It explains a lot.” Deciding to follow Roy’s suggestion, he slowly pushed himself up from the chair. Roy steadied him as he swayed a bit, then he took the few steps over to the bed and gingerly climbed up. The last hour of conversation had taken a lot out of him, and he leaned back against the pillow and closed his eyes. His head was throbbing again, and he decided that as soon as Roy left, he was going to call the nurse for some pain medication.

“Listen, um, I’m gonna get going and let you rest.”

“Okay.”

“You let me know what day you’re going home, and I’ll be here to pick you up.”

“All right.”

“And don’t worry about calling the station. Adam’s isn’t allowed to answer the phone any more.”

“Okay.” Johnny looked up at Roy meaningfully. “Thanks, Roy.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll see you later.”

“Okay.”

Roy made his way to the door.

“Roy?”

He turned back toward Johnny.

“Be careful, huh?”

“Don’t worry.”

Johnny nodded, and Roy disappeared from the room.

As he had promised himself, Johnny pushed the call button for the nurse. His mind was swimming from the information Roy had told him, and it had made his head pound. He was in desperate need of a long nap, after which he planned to think through thoroughly everything that Roy had told him. It was all so unbelievable. But right now he couldn’t think straight.

Nurse Debbie was back on duty and it was she who walked into the room to find out what the trouble was. She smiled sympathetically at Johnny’s request for pain relief, and asked if there was anything else he needed before telling him she would be right back. As he watched her leave to go get the medication, he noticed for the first time since regaining his vision how pretty she was, and appreciatively noticed how her shiny dark brown hair bounced with every step.

Two days later, Johnny called Roy at the station. Since Wesley was no longer answering the telephone, he didn’t have any trouble this time connecting with his best friend. Hank Stanley was happy to chat with Johnny for a few minutes before he put Roy on the phone, and was glad to hear Johnny sound a little more upbeat than the last time he had talked with him.

Everyone was in the dayroom during the conversation, and was able to gather from the one-sided exchange that Johnny was being released from the hospital. After several minutes, Roy said good-bye and hung up the phone; everyone noticed the happy expression on his face.

“Hey, Roy, they letting Johnny out of the hospital?”

Roy picked the telephone receiver back up to make another call. “Yeah, Chet. I’m gonna pick him up tomorrow morning.”

“Hey, that’s great news, Roy.” Marco was truly glad for his friend.

“It is, Marco.” Roy dialed the number quickly, then turned around to lean his back against the wall. He caught sight of Wesley, who was sitting on the couch with the newspaper, pretending he hadn’t heard the conversation. Roy heard his wife’s sister answer and greeted her. The others could all hear the one-sided conversation.

“Hi, Eileen….

“Uh, actually, I wanted to talk to you for a minute...

“Are…are you going to be going out today?

“You are? Good, uh, I was wondering if you could do me a favor…

“Uh, Eileen, Johnny’s getting out of the hospital tomorrow. I’m gonna go pick him up...

“Yeah. He’s still gonna be staying with us...

There was a pause.

“No, no, you don’t need to stay. But I was wondering if you could do me a big favor...

“See, Johnny doesn’t have anything to wear home from the hospital. Yeah, all his stuff was lost in the fire…

“Uh huh. Would you? Yeah, that’d be great...

“Yeah, just a couple pairs of Levis, size 33/36, and a couple of shirts…

“Yeah, large would be good.

“Oh, and I hate to ask this, but could you pick him up a pair of tennis shoes?

“Yeah, ‘bout a twelve medium I think.

“Huh? Underwear and socks? Oh, yeah, I guess you better…”

“Uh, I don’t know what size….”

Everyone heard Roy laugh at something Eileen said, and saw his face go slightly pink. He then rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“Thanks, Eileen…

“Yeah, I’ll be home in the morning before you leave for home and pick up the stuff then...

“Oh, okay…you sure you want to wait until after Johnny gets here to leave?

Roy smiled. “Yeah, I’m sure he’ll wanna see you too...

“Thanks, Eileen. I really appreciate it. I know Johnny will too…

“Okay, you too…

“Is Joanne there?

“No, no, don’t wake her up. Tell her I’ll call later...

“Okay, thanks…

“Bye.”

Roy hung up the phone; a small happy smile of satisfaction was on his lips. He walked over to the coffee pot and poured himself a cup. As he turned to head to the table, his attention was drawn to Wesley, where he was still sitting on the couch, and the look on the man’s face wiped the smile right off Roy’s. Wesley’s expression was dark, and he had a grim and almost frightening look that Roy had never seen before, and it sent a chill down his spine. Wesley didn’t seem to be aware that Roy was staring at him, and the senior paramedic had to tear his eyes away he was so unnerved by it. He decided that maybe it hadn’t been very wise to mention Johnny in front of the man. But damn it, he was tired of tiptoeing around the guy! If he couldn’t take it, then he should get out. He hadn’t thought about it when Johnny had called; the past few days Wesley had been acting fairly normal, and had made no advances, and so Roy was beginning to assume that the harassment had come to an end. Now, he realized he might be wrong.

Later during that day, Chet received a call from the supervisor at the body shop that was repairing his van. The man said he couldn’t be one hundred percent certain, since the damage to the front end of the van was extensive, but since Chet had asked, he reported that in his technician’s opinion, Chet’s brakes had been deliberately tampered with.

Roy was at the hospital by ten-thirty the next morning to pick Johnny up. He entered the room with a knock and a smile, and set the bag of clothes he had in his hand down on the end of the bed for Johnny. “Mornin’.”

“Mornin’.” Johnny looked at the bag; he’d been sitting in the chair again by the window in his pajamas and robe, waiting for Roy to show up. “What’s in the bag?”

“I thought you might wanna wear some clothes to leave the hospital in.”

Johnny looked a little surprised. He had thought about it earlier that morning, but it had only served to depress him when he thought of everything he owned being burned up in the fire. After that, he didn’t care any more, deciding that if he had to leave in his pajamas, so be it.

Getting up from his chair, Johnny hesitantly reached for the bag and opened it, looking down inside, then pulling the clothes out. He held in his hands a brand new pair of Levis, a shirt, underwear, socks, and lastly, he pulled out a pair of Adidas tennis shoes. As he inspected everything, he noticed they were all in his size. He looked up at Roy incredulously. “You buy all this?”

“I can’t take the credit. I had Eileen go out and do a little shopping for you yesterday.”

Johnny stared at Roy with his mouth half open for a few moments, then closed it and said a soft, “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

“You find out what Eileen spent, and I’ll pay her back for everything.”

“Okay. You sign the release papers yet?”

“Already done.”

“Well, c’mon then; go get dressed, and we’ll go home.”

Home, Johnny thought. I wish I had one. He sighed, picked up the bag, and went into the bathroom to get dressed. He didn’t care about undressing in front of Roy, but he didn’t want some nurse walking in on him in his birthday suit, so he chose to dress in the bathroom.

A few minutes later, Johnny emerged in his new clothes. He looked pretty good, Roy thought, although a bit tired. And, he’d definitely lost some of the weight he’d put on after his last surgery. His eyes weren’t as bright as usual, although that had been the status quo for some time, and his shoulders were a little slumped. If one didn’t know Johnny had just had brain surgery, they probably wouldn’t be able to figure it out; they’d only had to shave a section of hair away in the back, and Johnny had the rest of his long locks arranged over the bald spot so that it was barely visible. The bandages had been removed two days after his surgery, and now even the smaller one covering the incision had been removed, leaving the black stitches exposed.

Johnny was ready to go, and they finally left the hospital. It felt all too familiar for both men; with the exception of the last time Johnny was in Rampart for the gunshot wound, Roy had picked him up all the other times. It felt odd to both of them to be walking out of a different hospital this time.

It was turning out to be quite a warm day, and they drove with the windows open. Roy decided not to put the top down, figuring the wind might be too uncomfortable for Johnny, given his recent surgery. The two paramedics remained quiet, both at ease in a familiar silence born of spending long hours with one another. Neither one needed words right now; just the comfortable feeling of once again sitting side by side was enough for both of them.

Johnny finally broke the silence about halfway home. “Hey, Roy; could you stop at the bank?”

“Sure, Johnny; which one?”

“First Federal; there’s a branch on Fifth; take a left here.”

“I know where it is.”

Roy drove to the bank, parked, and walked inside with Johnny so that he could withdraw some money. Luckily, his wallet had been in his pocket the night of the earthquake, so he had his driver’s license and ID’s and credit cards. He went ahead and ordered new checks, since he was quite sure his checkbook had burned up in the fire.

As he stood there waiting in line, it occurred to him what an overwhelming task it was going to be to get all his personal assets in order. It wasn’t just the material loss that affected him, although losing his most treasured belongings was certainly the most emotionally devastating. But now, he had no records of anything. Years of income taxes, receipts, bank statements, credit card statements, invoices, mortgage information, and other important paperwork were gone forever, which could make his life incredibly complicated and confusing for quite some time. And his mail; who knew where that was being directed. He supposed the post office was holding it, but he really had no idea. Bills would be piling up that he never received; he had to get them taken care of. He realized he had an enormous amount of responsibilities; the list was so long he didn’t know where to start. If he hadn’t been so overwhelmed, perhaps just the fact that he was eliminating one thing off his list right at that moment would have offered some consolation, but his tortured mind wouldn’t allow even that one small concession.

Roy saw the frown form on his friend’s face as he moved up one in line, and then heard the deep sigh, followed by a brief closing of eyes, and knew instinctively what Johnny must be thinking; it’s certainly what he would be thinking if he were in Johnny’s shoes. He was overwhelmed.

Finally Johnny’s turn came and he took care of his business as quickly as possible, then the two left, heading for the DeSoto house.

Johnny was solemn and quiet on the way back, wanting desperately to just be able to forget his problems, but his mind was constantly assaulted with fresh tribulations. He felt like he was in a pool of water, drowning, and every time he tried to swim to the surface, someone dumped more water on top of him, pushing him farther under.

Roy didn’t know what to say to him. What could one say to someone who was experiencing what Johnny was? There were no words that wouldn’t sound trite, and so Roy remained quiet, until a question occurred to him that he thought he should ask. He felt awkward bringing it up, but wanted to make sure that just in case Johnny needed his help, he wouldn’t be too embarrassed to ask.

“Uh, hey, Johnny?”

John looked over at his friend behind the wheel.

“I, ah, I don’t mean to be nosy, but I was wondering if…well, do you need any, uh, financial…help with anything?”

Johnny stared at Roy in surprise, wondering why he would ask such a question.

Roy glanced at him, then said softly, “I know you gave the money away.”

Johnny’s mouth dropped open. How could Roy have found out about that? After a moment, he asked, “How did you know?”

Roy smiled softly. “A very nice lady stopped by the station about a week ago looking for you. She said she and her father knew you from the nursing home.”

John knew instantly now and he turned his head to look out the windshield, nodding silently.

“She wanted to thank you for your…donation.”

“Oh,” he said quietly. “You met Meredith.”

“Yeah. She’s a real nice lady, Johnny. She’s the one who told us about your aunt.”

Johnny looked down at the dashboard and nodded.

“Johnny…what you did was…really generous, but…why did you give…so much away?”

Johnny shrugged, not really wanting to discuss it. “They needed it.”

“Yeah, they did. But you must have given up nearly all your winnings.” When Johnny remained quiet, Roy sat thoughtfully for a long moment; when his eyes finally met Johnny’s, a touch of disbelief and fear was discernable in his blue eyes. “Johnny, you…you weren’t thinking about….”

Johnny slowly turned to look at him, and he when saw the apprehension and doubt in his friend’s face, it surprised him to discover what he now knew Roy was thinking. “You were wondering if…if I was thinking about killing myself?”

Roy swallowed and nodded. “Yeah.”

“No. I wasn’t.” Johnny snorted. “Hell, Roy, I don’t need to commit suicide; all I have to do is walk outside my door and I almost get killed – ”

Roy let out his breath and relaxed his shoulders, relieved not only at Johnny’s answer, but also that he seemed to be joking about it. “Ah, c’mon Johnny; that’s not true.”

Johnny looked at him incredulously, then his face relaxed, suddenly touched by how devastated Roy had looked at the thought of him committing suicide. “I guess I figure by now if something’s gonna get me, it’s gonna get me. There’s not a whole lot I can do about it. I’m either really lucky, or I’m just incredibly cursed, like Chet said. And these days I don’t think it’s the former.”

“Johnny, things are gonna get better for you. I know they are.”

Johnny eyed Roy from the corner of his eye. “Didn’t you say something similar to me just a few months ago? It was right before I won that money, I believe.”

Roy grimaced, remembering clearly their conversation months ago when Johnny first started talking about his luck. “Maybe so, but Johnny, I’ve still got a feeling things are gonna turn around for you.”

“Well, they couldn’t get much worse,” he murmured, then shuddered inwardly at that thought.

 “And me, and Joanne, and the guys are all gonna be there for you, you know that, don’t you?”

Johnny smiled quietly. “I know. Thank you.”

Things were quiet again for a minute, then Roy said, “You never did say why you gave so much of your money away.”

Johnny sighed. “Well, I didn’t give it all away. I still have some left to keep me afloat for awhile. I just…” he shook his head, “Roy, winning that money only made a mess of my life, and it caused my aunt to lose hers. I just wanted it to do some good somewhere, ‘cause it sure didn’t help me any. I was happier without it.”

“Well, you did a noble thing. I’m sure all those people at Sunnyside Estates are gonna have a nicer life because of it.”

“I wasn’t tryin’ to be noble, Roy. I just wanted to make their lives easier.”

“It will.”

Roy kept driving, thinking about his friend. He’d known Johnny many years now, and the man never ceased to amaze him. Just when he thought he had him figured out, he’d do something totally opposite of what Roy would expect of him. The money was a good example. Giving it away would have been the last thing Roy expected him to do. While it seemed at first that Johnny only wanted to spend the money on himself, it actually turned out to be the opposite. John had been more generous with it than anyone would have believed. From the very beginning, he’d constantly used it to help out his friends, both in their personal needs, and in the needs of the station. He’d given very generous gifts to Roy and Joanne and to their children as well, going as far as setting money aside for his children’s college education. With everything that had been happening lately, Roy had forgotten about having the swimming pool constructed that Johnny had given them for Christmas, and the thought of it now warmed him. His life had been so distressing lately, and now he actually had something to look forward to this summer. Glancing over at Johnny now, who was quietly looking out the side window with a faraway look, Roy felt ashamed that his jealousy had caused a mar in their friendship. At least things seemed to be getting back on the right track now, and for that, he was glad.

They had to pass Johnny’s neighborhood on the way to Roy’s, and Johnny seemed to awaken as they neared the exit. “Hey, Roy?”

“Yeah?”

“Get off on Davington, would ya?”

Roy glanced toward him. “Why?”

Johnny licked his lips. “I just wanna….stop by my house and, and, and see if maybe there’s anything left – ”

“Johnny, you just got out of the hospital. You need to rest. Why don’t we just go ho – ”

“Please, Roy? I just wanna check.”

“Johnny, I saw the house; there’s nothing – ”

“Please?” Johnny’s appeal almost had a desperate tone to it.

Against his better judgment, and at the last second, Roy pulled into the exit lane, coasted down to the light, and turned. From there, he maneuvered the Porsche through the tree-lined streets into the quiet, and now quite devastated neighborhood. The two men stared as they passed the many majestic houses whose once perfectly manicured lawns were now littered with debris. Neither man had really noticed how bad it was until now. Some houses stood untouched, yet others were severely damaged. However, as they turned down another street, they heard the high-pitched whir of power saws and hammers pounding, as the owners had already begun to rebuild, the streets having become dirty with the residue of their efforts.

They rolled up their windows as dust swirled around the small Porsche, and finally they were in front of what was left of Johnny’s house. Roy had a bad feeling as he pulled up as far as he could into the driveway and stopped. Johnny sat there, unmoving for a long time, while his eyes took in the devastation. Finally, he fumbled for the door handle, pulled it, and got out. Roy followed suit, and stayed a little ways behind Johnny as he slowly began to walk around the house.

Johnny stepped up onto the front porch first, trying to peer inside past the once beautiful mahogany door, now charred and hanging by one hinge. Blackened debris was piled up everywhere, and he realized that he wasn’t going to be able to get into the house this way. As he climbed down from the porch and began to walk around the side of the house, his jaw was set in determination, and he continued on to the back of the house. He was going to find something salvageable, if it was the last thing he did.

Roy followed silently, until they reached the area where the back door had been, now buried in rubble. The fire hadn’t quite reached all the way to the back of the house, and part of it still stood, although there was still a good deal of destruction. Carefully, Johnny picked his way over piles of chipped stones, fallen bricks, and blackened timber, searching for a way into the house. Johnny went from one end to the other, his frustration building as his attempts to enter were blocked. After several minutes, Johnny finally stopped and just stared at the house, as though trying to figure out what to do next. The magnitude of his loss slowly engulfed him. Everything was gone. Not a single thing had survived.

His eyes fell on the piece of torn canvas that had once been the awning, now lying stained and torn on the ground. Impulsively, Johnny reached down with both hands and picked up the awning, then angrily flung it, along with the metal supports that had once held it onto the house, as far as he could. Full of air, it floated upward for a moment, then made a muffled clanging noise as it deflated and hit a pile of fallen stone. A piece of the metal support pole had fallen at Johnny’s feet, and with a sudden rage, Johnny picked it up as well, reached back with his arm, and hurled it as forcefully as he could into the house. Roy heard him utter an anguished expletive as he next drew back his foot and swung it into a pile of debris nearby, sending several pieces of it sailing into the air. Roy withdrew his hands from his pockets, and stood frozen, wondering whether he should stop his friend. When Johnny kicked at another pile, and it didn’t move aside as easily, he could tell that Johnny had hurt his foot in the process. An even louder expletive escaped Johnny’s mouth then; and the dark-haired paramedic stood bent over at the waist for a moment while he waited for his throbbing toe to stop hurting. Roy made his move then, and picking up a large stone, approached Johnny. Wordlessly, he handed his friend the rock. With a heaving chest, Johnny stared at it in his hand, and seconds later, flung it toward a window with the force of a major league pitcher. Most of the glass had already been broken, but Johnny managed to hit a remaining pane, and it rewarded the fuming man with a loud shatter. Roy backed out of the way, deciding his friend needed to vent his anger. Johnny pick up one last stone, and lofted it, too, into another window, although after he had thrown it, his shoulders slumped, and all at once he seemed to deflate. Finally recognizing the futility of it, he simply stopped and stared, swallowing as he recalled all the little things that had been important to him that had been destroyed. Most of them would be meaningless and worthless to anyone else, but to him these small trinkets were evidence of his life. Hot tears came unbidden at the corners of his eyes, and he lowered his head, bringing his hand up to cover his eyelids. Slowly, he sank down to sit in the dirt, now wishing fervently that they hadn’t come. Roy was wishing the same thing.

Roy watched as Johnny rested his right arm on his knee, burying his head in it, then saw his shoulders shake just once. He left him alone for a time, then when it appeared that Johnny wasn’t going to get up, Roy walked over and stood beside him.

Johnny saw Roy’s feet appear next to him, then felt a hand on his shoulder.

“C’mon. Let’s go,” Roy said gently. I knew this was a bad idea. I never should have let him talk me into coming here.

Johnny felt a hand under his arm coaxing him to stand, and slowly he lifted his head. Taking a deep breath, he pushed himself up from the ground with Roy’s help. Standing in place, he raked a shaky hand through his hair. “You know,” he said with a voice raspy with emotion, “I never did like this house.”

“Yeah.” Roy’s voice was quiet as he patted his friend’s shoulder once. The senior paramedic gazed out toward the swimming pool, becoming lost in thought a few moments. Finally, he spoke. “Johnny, I was thinkin’; maybe tomorrow me and some of the guys could come over here with our turnouts and stuff, and, and see if we can’t get inside and poke around a bit. Maybe there’s a few things we can save.”

Johnny’s face showed appreciation, even though he knew there was probably little chance they would find anything, Roy’s generous gesture comforted him. A small smile formed at the corner of his mouth to show his gratitude, and he nodded, knowing his friend’s intent was only meant to ease his pain.

Desperate to go, but desperate to stay at the same time, Johnny glanced around the yard one last time. His eyes fell on the small patio table by the far side of the swimming pool, and his heart raced for a second when he realized what was on that table. Wordlessly, he left Roy’s side and strode over to the table, his pace quickening the nearer he got. He finally made it to the table, and gently picked up one of the items that had been left there, cradling it in his hand.

A moment later, Roy was next to him, curious as to what his friend had discovered. Johnny was holding a teacup, which he had removed from its saucer. It was full of silt and the coffee had long dried along the sides of the cup, but it was intact; the delicate but simple flowers embellishing the sides looked surprisingly feminine.

Two cups and saucers had been forgotten one morning before the earthquake, and had remained out on that table. He and Heather had enjoyed their coffee out there, and had neglected to clean up. All four pieces were unbroken, sitting exactly as they’d left them many days ago.

Johnny stared at them wonderingly, the memories filtering in. “These were my mother’s,” he said simply. “I can’t believe I forgot them out here…”

Roy smiled quietly, glad that at least one small thing had been salvaged. From the look on Johnny’s face, it was an important item. He touched his friend’s arm. “Hold on a minute; I’ll be right back.”

Roy was back minutes later carrying a paper bag and a towel he had scavenged from his car. Gently, he took the two cups and plates, and wrapped them in the towel, then lowered them into the grocery bag. He rolled down the top to keep them secure, and then both men turned, and slowly made their way back to Roy’s car. 

Johnny, Joanne, and Eileen had a quiet reunion when the two paramedics finally made it to the DeSoto house. Johnny was glad to see Joanne back at home and looking much better than she had the last time he had seen her, and she was grateful that he had survived yet another near tragedy. Joanne’s sister Eileen, although married with her own children, had always had a bit of a harmless crush on Johnny; of course, she never acted on it, but just the same she was always happy to stick around in order to visit with the handsome man. Roy sometimes teased her about it when her husband wasn’t around, and she played along, teasing right back. Johnny had no idea that Joanne’s sister felt the way she did, and she intended to keep it that way.

Despite the fact that Joanne was still in a cast herself, she and Eileen both doted on the dark-haired paramedic, but Johnny shrugged off their concern when they expressed their sympathy about his aunt, house, and other misfortunes. The last thing he wanted was to be reminded of it all, and with an inward groan, hoped he wouldn’t regret agreeing to stay there. He remained polite and reasonably social while Eileen was there, especially since she had gone to the trouble to shop for him, but as soon as she left, Johnny retreated to the DeSoto’s spare bedroom to be alone, saying he was tired. He did in fact, fall asleep shortly after he shut himself in the room, and didn’t awaken until dinnertime. The depression and the overwhelming realities of his life combined with the lingering ill effects of his recent surgery just made him want to sleep. It seemed to be one of the few things that allowed him to temporarily forget his troubles, at least when he wasn’t dreaming about his troubles.

Roy kept his promise, returning the next day to Johnny’s house with Chet and Marco in tow. Together, the three firefighters donned helmets and turnouts to conduct as safe a search of Johnny’s destroyed house as it would allow. They picked through rubble for three hours, and in the end were able to produce a small box of items that were unharmed; miraculously, two of the items were framed photographs that somehow managed to escape the heat of the fire. When they returned to the house and placed those two items in Johnny’s hands, he was barely able to utter a choked ‘thank you’ over the lump that had materialized in his throat. The three firefighters watched their friend with pleased smiles, knowing that just rescuing these few items made it well worth the time they had spent. Johnny stared down at the old black and white photographs a long time, then finally took them into the guest room and set them on the dresser. Later, he took the frames apart, cleaned them, and carefully reinserted the cherished photographs. For the first time in days, Johnny felt thankful for something: his friends.

The next few days were filled with stress, to put it mildly, and unexpected visitors. Johnny forced himself to get up the next morning in order to begin the monumental task of straightening out his affairs. The day was spent on the telephone with calls to all his creditors, insurance companies, and mortgage company, trying to straighten out the paper messes in his life. He broke for lunch, feeling guilty that he had tied up the DeSoto telephone line for so long, but Roy and Joanne assured him it was no problem. The last call of the day left him exhausted, after arguing with his insurance company for forty-five minutes about his house, and whether or not he had earthquake insurance. They insisted he didn’t, and he insisted he did, or at least he thought sure he did; he thought he had purchased the extra policy on top of his homeowner’s policy – at least he had intended to, but now that his house had burnt to the ground, any evidence he might have had went up in flames. He had a uneasy feeling in his stomach that the fire in his home wouldn’t be covered since it was caused by the earthquake, and they were claiming they had no records of any earthquake insurance policy. He had been transferred to four different people, after explaining the situation to each, before he actually was able to reach someone who might be able to help him. Even after all that, the agent had told him she would have to get back to him later. By two o’clock, he felt drained, and retreated to the guest room with a headache, where he first downed a few aspirin before collapsing onto the bed. Some two hours later, the doorbell awakened him.

Johnny sat up in bed, trying to blink the sleep out of his eyes, and heard voices at the front door. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know who was there, but somehow the voice sounded a little familiar, and his curiosity got the better of him. He slid off the bed, and haphazardly combing his fingers through his hair, ventured out into the living room to see whom it was.

Roy was talking to a man at the door, and when he heard his wife apologize to Johnny for waking him, he turned, revealing the mystery person.

Johnny took a few steps into the room, and was dumbfounded when he saw Troy Banks standing there.

The man peered in at him, and with a tentative smile, waved hesitantly. “Hello, John,” he said.

“Troy.” Johnny said his name not in an angry tone, but in one of confusion. “Wha…what’re you doing here?”

“I, ah, came to talk to you for a moment, if that’s all right with you.”

Johnny’s brow scrunched in puzzlement. “How did you know I was here?”

“Heather told me you were staying with your friend, Roy.”

Johnny nodded slowly. “Oh.” How did she know where I was? “Well, um, c’mon in, if you’d like. Ah, Roy, this is Troy Banks, Heather’s brother.”

“Yeah, we met.” Roy invited the man in, then introduced him to Joanne, who was sitting on the sofa with her leg propped up.

“Thank you, Mr. DeSoto, uh, I won’t stay long; I just wanted to talk to John for a moment.”

“Roy. Call me Roy. And make yourself at home.” He gestured to the couch.

Joanne sensed this needed to be a private conversation, and started to get up, grabbing her crutches.

“Joanne, you don’t have to leave,” Johnny protested.

“I know, Johnny. I just thought it was about time to get started on dinner. You two, go ahead and talk. C’mon, Roy.”

Roy helped her up, knowing she didn’t really intend to fix dinner; that was his job tonight, and one of the only perks Joanne discovered to come along with having a broken leg. Until it healed up, and when Roy was home, he was the chef in the DeSoto household.

Johnny sat down in a chair across from Troy, who looked slightly uncomfortable, but didn’t hesitate when he finally began speaking. The man proceeded to thank Johnny for what he had done at their house the night of the earthquake. His comments were soft and humble as he acknowledged Johnny’s bravery and selflessness in his rescuing of himself, his father, and even his mother’s little dog.

Johnny was rendered speechless by the man’s unexpected praise, and his face became flushed at the forward and candid manor of this man, whom he knew previously, had loathed him. He didn’t really know what to say, so he simply murmured a quiet, ‘you’re welcome’, along with a few silent nods of the head.

“I really misjudged you, John; and for that, I apologize.”

Johnny smiled wanly, then responded, “Well, I guess you could say we both misjudged each other then.”

Troy smiled sadly, then added, “Yes, well, Heather certainly thinks the world of you, and…so does my father. I hope you can forgive me for…my poor manners; but being Heather’s brother, I guess sometimes I get carried away with trying to protect her from…the wolves,” he grinned, “you understand, I’m sure.”

Johnny smiled uncomfortably and nodded.

“Do you have a sister?”

“Uh, no, I…I don’t have…any siblings.” Any more.

“Oh.”

A long uncomfortable silence ensued, and Johnny wondered how long it would be before the man left.

Troy finally broke the silence. “It’s a shame now that we won’t get the chance to know each other better, eh?”

Johnny didn’t know how to respond to that, so he remained quiet, his deep brown eyes meeting Troy’s blue ones.

Troy looked down at his folded hands, then back up at Johnny. “She’s….heartbroken, you know.”

Johnny’s heart suddenly knotted, and he licked his lips, diverting his gaze downward. After a few moments, he looked up. “I’m sorry for that. But it’s really for the best.” He looked hard at Troy. “You know as well as I do that I’m just not cut from the same mold…as your family is.” He looked away again. “It would have been a mistake….” His words trailed off as it got too hard to say any more.

Troy inhaled deeply and sighed. “Yes, well, I’m not so sure that you’re correct about that. At any rate, if you…ever get an inkling to go another round of polo, let me know. I’d welcome you on my team any time.”

From inside the kitchen, Joanne mouthed “polo?” to Roy, her face incredulous. The DeSoto house wasn’t large, and the walls were thin. They had been able to hear almost the entire conversation from inside the kitchen.

Roy looked at his wife and whispered, “I’ll explain it later.”

Johnny smiled softly, humbled again by the compliment. “Yeah, well, maybe one day, if I ever get on a horse again. You can let me know if you ever need a substitute.”

Troy smiled wide, his perfectly straight white teeth gleamed. “It’s a deal.” He stood up, and leaning forward, reached to shake Johnny’s hand.

Johnny stood up as well and took his hand, shaking it, glad to make amends with the man, but sad that it was really coming too late.

“Oh, there’s one other thing, John.”

“What’s that?”

“My father, he’d like it if you could stop by the house sometime; ah, the summer house, that is.”

Johnny raised his eyebrows in surprise, then recovered. “How’s he doing?”

“Quite well, actually. He came home a few days ago; Mother is trying to keep him resting, but she won’t keep him from work for long, I’m afraid. He was….quite disappointed to hear about you and Heather breaking up.”

Johnny mumbled an unintelligible reply.

“At any rate, he’d like to speak with you. And he wanted me to tell you that, he intends to take care of having the yacht repaired.”

Johnny shook his head immediately. “He doesn’t have to do that. I have insuran – ”

Troy waved away what Johnny was about to say with his hand. “Your insurance won’t begin to cover those damages. Father has already checked. They won’t give you nearly what the boat is worth, and so he’s going to see to it that it’s repaired properly back to its original condition.”

Johnny’s mouth opened in disbelief, and he argued for only a moment with Troy, until the younger man insisted that there was to be no arguing, that it was something his father wanted to do; that it was only a very small gesture of thanks after John saved his life. Troy also explained that his father had a bit of a sentimentality attached to that boat, and couldn’t bear to see it totaled.

Johnny muttered out a rather embarrassed thank you, and then Troy announced that he had to be going; he had a tennis match to get to, and he left, leaving Johnny standing rather stunned in the living room.

Roy and Joanne came out of the kitchen a few minutes later, pretending not to have heard any of the conversation. Roy helped Joanne back onto the sofa, and arranged her leg back on top of the pillow. “What did Heather’s brother want, Johnny?” Roy asked nonchalantly.

Johnny turned and looked suspiciously at Roy, and, tilting his head slightly sideways, ignored his question. “Do you have any idea how Heather knew I was staying here?”

Roy thrust his hands in his pockets and took a step toward Johnny. “Yeah,” he said quietly, “I told her.”

“You told her.”

Roy looked at Johnny hesitantly. “She’s called the station a few times wondering how you were. She asked where you were going to be staying after you were released, so I told her you were staying with me. That’s all.”

Johnny stared at Roy somberly, then looked away.

“I was gonna tell you she called, Johnny, but I just couldn’t find a good time to bring it up in the last day or so. I just didn’t wanna…”

“S’okay.” Johnny waved off whatever Roy was going to say and walked over to the front window to look outside.

Roy rubbed his chin and took a step in Johnny’s direction. He regarded Johnny’s profile as the dark-haired man stared vacantly through the glass. He spoke quietly. “Johnny, maybe…maybe you should call her; you know…at least let her know how you are…” His voice trailed off when he saw Johnny stiffen.

Johnny stood statue-like at the window, one hand resting on the frame, while the fingers on the other hand clenched together tightly as it hung by his side. “You know,” he said without turning, “the whole time I was with Heather, everyone thought we were wrong for each other. Now that I’ve broken up with her, everyone seems to think that we should get back together.” He stopped, obviously struggling with his emotions. Suddenly, he felt like he was suffocating. He had to get out, to be alone. Abruptly, he turned, and strode toward the door, almost desperate to get outside. He grasped the knob, and pulled the door open.”

“Johnny? Where’re you goin’? I – ”

John cut off his friend. “Just goin’ for a walk. I’ll be back.” And with that, he stepped outside, pulling the door closed behind him.

Roy and Joanne stared at one another. Roy walked over to the window to watch where his friend was going, and saw Johnny head down the street, and then turn the corner. Sighing, Roy thrust his hands in his pockets. Obviously, mentioning Heather had been the wrong thing to do. He felt bad now, as if he himself were guilty for the breakup between his best friend and his girlfriend. He was guilty of conveying more than once that he thought Heather wasn’t right for Johnny. Now, he considered that he might have made a hasty judgment. Maybe he should have just kept his opinions to himself. Johnny had been so happy with her; why hadn’t he just kept his mouth shut? He’d seen another side of Heather recently that hadn’t been apparent before, and now he was afraid that maybe he had been wrong about her. He wondered; had he really felt they were a bad match, or maybe instead he had let his envy of Johnny’s riches and new lifestyle cloud his judgment about his girlfriend. Or, maybe he had been resentful of all the time Johnny was spending with her, time that in the past had been reserved for things the two of them did together.

Joanne broke into his thoughts. “Johnny really misses her, doesn’t he?”

Roy looked down at his feet. “Yeah.”

Johnny strode down the sidewalk quickly, anxious to get away. The mere mention of Heather’s name had brought an aching to his heart that seemed to radiate out all through his body, encompassing everything. Not seeing her was like being in withdrawal, and felt every bit as painful as discontinuing a dependent drug. He knew he had to purge himself of her and that with time it would get easier, but right now just thinking about Heather cut like a knife. If only things had worked out differently, maybe life wouldn’t be so difficult to deal with. Maybe the death of his aunt and the loss of everything else would have been a little easier if he’d had someone he loved to face it with him, to stand by him during it. He knew he could have had her with him during that time, and even now, but what was the point? That would be like living a lie. Hell, she hadn’t even known he had an aunt, had never thought enough of him to even ask about his family. Of course, he never volunteered the information either.

Johnny knew Roy was trying his best to be supportive, and he was grateful; Roy had gone out of his way to prove that he was still a true friend, and that meant a lot. And it wasn’t just Roy. He had the shoulders of all his friends to lean on. Knowing that at least eased some of the pain. But just the same, it was hard to be around Roy, knowing his friend was constantly scrutinizing him, worrying. It made him uncomfortable, and while he appreciated Roy’s concern, he didn’t want it. In all honesty, he didn’t feel he deserved it; after all, all his problems were brought on by one person – himself.

The more he thought about it, the more Johnny realized that staying at Roy’s had been a mistake. He desperately wanted to get out and be alone. He had been there less than two days, and was already tired of having to put up a front, to talk when he didn’t feel like it, to eat when he didn’t feel like eating, to pretend nothing was wrong, when in reality, everything was wrong. But he had promised Roy, had told him he would keep an eye on Joanne, which was ridiculous for a man who had just been released from the hospital after having brain surgery. He knew what Roy was up to. Maybe Roy did feel more comfortable having Johnny there in case Joanne needed him, but Roy also was trying to play psychiatrist, thinking that Johnny needed to be around people after what he’d been through. Well, he didn’t want to be around people right now. But unfortunately, he didn’t have anywhere else to go, other than a hotel. And besides, he had promised, and if there was one thing true about John Gage, he never went back on a promise.

As he walked, Johnny began to look at it from another angle. Maybe he was being selfish. Instead of only thinking of himself, maybe he should be thinking about Roy and his family. Roy had been through a lot of crap recently too, and Johnny knew that if Roy was seriously considering leaving his position at 51, he must be stressed out to the max. What if this Wesley character was dangerous? Roy’s life or the lives of the other men at the station could be in jeopardy. It all sounded so melodramatic, but what if it was true? And what could he do about it? He damned himself again; if only he hadn’t won the money, this wouldn’t even be happening. He wouldn’t have quit his job, and by now he would have been back to work and Wesley Adams would be history. It was startling how one small decision could have so much impact on everyone else’s lives. It occurred to him that he wasn’t the only one who needed a little support right now, and chastised himself for copping an attitude. I never should have snapped at Roy. None of this is his fault. Maybe if I’d have listened to him in the first place, none of this would have happened. God, he felt pathetic. How was he ever going to straighten his life out?

            Johnny walked for an hour, hoping the solitude he craved would provide some answers, or at least some peace. It didn’t ease his discomfort; all he could think about was Heather, and how lonely he was without her, his aunt, and how he would never see her again because of what he had done, and when those subjects hadn’t made him feel rotten enough, his thoughts turned to the ending of his career as a fireman and paramedic, the loss of all his lifelong posessions, and all his other problems, in addition to Roy’s. It seemed he had nothing else to think about. The problems seemed to be swirling around in his brain at a daunting speed, the overwhelmingness of them building to such gigantic proportions that he began to feel sick to his stomach. After a while, the heat of the day became too intense, and Johnny had to turn around and head back. When he returned, his face was flushed red from the heat, he was sweating, and his head was pounding once again. He hated the worried stares he received from Roy and Joanne when he came through the front door, and forced a smile, once again trying to pretend everything was just hunky dory.

            Then the kids came running; they were home from school and were anxious to see him. Little Jennifer ran to him, begging him to play Barbies with her, and Chris pleaded with him to come outside and throw the baseball with him. Roy immediately put a halt to it, seeing the tired and distressed look that his friend was trying to hide, and told the kids to back off, that Uncle Johnny was still recovering from his hospital stay, and that he probably just wanted to relax for a while before dinner. Johnny promised the kids he would fulfill their requests after dinner, much as he didn’t want to. After that, he told Roy he was going to do just that, go relax, and once again, he retreated to the bedroom.

            Johnny was lying on his back on the bed, his left arm hanging limply over his eyes when Roy came to get him for dinner. He had grilled hamburgers that night, knowing it was one of Johnny’s favorites. Johnny didn’t respond when Roy stood in the doorway and quietly called his name, and when Roy went to stand by the bed, he saw Johnny’s chest slowly rising and falling; the man was obviously sound asleep. Roy elected not to wake him, and after silently shutting his door, he left to go eat with his family.

Johnny stirred and rolled over in bed, then slowly opened his eyes. He felt disoriented for a moment, unsure of where he was. Everything was quiet as a tomb, and the room was dark. Glancing over at the bedside table, the clock read one-fifteen, and all of a sudden, he remembered where he was, recalling the previous day’s events. He sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, then groaned inwardly as he remembered that he had never come out for dinner that night. Why hadn’t they woken him?

His stomach growled, and he had to go to the bathroom. He figured that’s probably what had pulled him from his sleep. Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, he stood up, still in his jeans and t-shirt, and headed out of the room for the bathroom.

He was awake after that, and decided to take a stroll to the kitchen. Flicking on the light over the stove only, he opened the refrigerator to see what might be available. He found a couple of leftover hamburgers wrapped up in plastic, and decided that’s what he would snack on. Grabbing a plate from the cabinet, he put one burger on it and heated it up in the new microwave he had bought for Roy and Joanne a few months ago. He stopped the microwave before it would beep, so as not to wake anyone up. He knew Roy had to work in the morning. Slumped alone at the kitchen table, the sandwich seemed tasteless as he mechanically forced himself to eat it. He finished the burger, then set the plate in the sink, wondering what he should do next. Wide awake now, but weary, he suddenly had a craving for a drink. Just a little something to relax him, to numb everything. Johnny wasn’t sure how he was going to get back to sleep otherwise.

The DeSotos weren’t drinkers, but kept a cabinet with liquor for special occasions, and Johnny knew where it was. Creeping quietly out into the living room, he opened the cabinet, and pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels. He took it into the kitchen, and poured a couple of shots into a short glass, then returned the bottle to the cabinet. He then headed outside to the back patio with it.

The amber liquid burned going down, but it relaxed him, and he closed his eyes as he felt it work its magic. It was a lovely night; totally quiet except for loads of crickets making music, and Johnny closed his eyes, listening to the concert while he sipped his drink. After he had finished the first drink, he got up to get another, returning shortly with his ‘medicine’ that would help him forget everything, if only for a little while. He never even stopped to consider that drinking alcohol would be one of the worst things he could do, given his frequent headaches, and the recent surgery.

Roy was up before dawn, unable to sleep. As he shuffled by the guest room on his way to the kitchen to make coffee, he saw the door was open, and that Johnny was gone. After experiencing a slight panic at not being able to find his friend during a search of the house, he finally spotted Johnny outside on the deck, stretched out in one of the lawn chairs. Quietly, Roy slid the glass doors open and walked over to his friend. Roy stared down at the sleeping man a few moments, then bent down to pick up the almost empty glass left on the ground next to the chair. Roy grimaced after smelling its contents, and took the glass inside. Moments later, he returned with a blanket, gently laid it over his friend, then retreated inside to get ready for the day.

Roy called home frequently that next day at work to check on his wife and friend. When Johnny was present, Joanne was upbeat on the phone, reporting that everything was fine, and that the two of them had just been taking it easy, relaxing and watching television. She made it a point to mention how helpful Johnny had been that morning, getting her breakfast, waiting on her ‘hand and foot’, and even doing a little laundry. But later, when Johnny was in his bedroom and out of earshot, Joanne relayed how depressed and sluggish the man seemed, and how he wasn’t eating well, and that he seemed to sleep most of the day. There wasn’t anything Roy could do about it, and together they commiserated, hoping that with time, Johnny would get back to his old self.

An unwanted visitor showed up late that afternoon, just before dinner. Joanne was relaxing in her usual position with her leg propped up under a pillow, when the doorbell rang. Johnny appeared almost instantly, motioning for Joanne to stay put, that he would get the door. He’d decided he needed to be more attentive to Joanne, wanting to pay back some of Roy’s hospitality and kindness with some of his own.

The woman on the other side of the door was equally startled to see his face when he pulled the door open; their faces mirrored each other’s almost exactly. Doreen Adams stood on the front stoop, holding a casserole dish between two mitted hands. Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open at the sight of Johnny, and she stammered out a chilly hello. Her husband hadn’t bothered to mention to her that Gage would be staying with the DeSoto’s; for that matter, her husband hadn’t bothered to talk to her about much of anything lately.

Johnny stared at the woman, for once in his life unable to find any words to say. One part of his brain told him to be polite and cordial; the other part could only remember the cruel and hateful lies she had told about him, and about Roy.

When he didn’t say anything, Doreen stood up taller, indignantly informing him that she would like to see Joanne. Johnny turned back to look at his partner’s wife, who was pushing herself forward on the sofa, her face set stonily in an angry expression. He took a step toward her, and Doreen took advantage of the fact that Johnny had moved away from the door, and invited herself in, juggling the casserole in one hand while she opened the door with the other. Johnny whirled as he heard the screen door open, and began to protest the woman’s brash entrance. Just when he had begun to tell Doreen that Joanne wasn’t up to seeing her, Joanne held her hand up and stopped him.

“It’s okay, Johnny. She can come in. I have a few things I want to say to her.” Joanne’s tone wasn’t friendly; it was laced with vehemence and resentment.

Johnny looked at her with uncertainty, caught in the middle of the room between the two women.

Doreen thrust the casserole dish into his hands. “This is for the DeSotos.” She emphasized the word ‘DeSotos. “Would you please take it into the kitchen?” she said curtly.

Johnny stood there holding the warm casserole, and Joanne looked up at him, her eyes softening. “Just put it on the counter, Johnny,” she said gently, letting him know that she needed a private discussion with the woman.

Slowly, Johnny nodded, respecting Joanne’s request, and retreated into the kitchen with the casserole. He pulled out a chair and sat down, wondering what Joanne was going to say to the woman. He didn’t have to wait long, or listen hard. It was easy to hear the entire conversation. Joanne’s voice was the first he heard, and it was shaking with controlled anger.

“How dare you show up at my house after what you’ve done,” he heard her growl at Doreen.

Doreen’s reply was indignant. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, you know exactly what I’m talking about.”

“No I don’t. All I know is that I came here today, trying to be a good friend, to see how you were doing, despite the fact that lately you haven’t been a very good friend.”

“I wouldn’t call making up lies about my husband trying to be a good friend.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, don’t play dumb, Doreen. Roy and I know exactly what you said to Chet’s girlfriend at the Fireman’s Spaghetti Dinner.”

“What I said or didn’t say in that bathroom was a private conversation.”

“Well maybe you should have made sure first that no one else was in the bathroom listening before you started spewing lies.”

“Lies? What lies? I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true and you know it.”

“I know nothing of the kind.”

“Joanne, all I said was that Roy and Wes had become very good friends, and that Roy hated to lose him as a partner.”

“That’s not quite the way you put it Doreen. You said,” Joanne’s voice had been rising, and now it dropped a notch, “you said that Roy didn’t want to be John Gage’s partner any more, that he was, how did you put it, ‘tired of picking up the pieces when John continually got injured’? You also said that Roy didn’t even want to be Johnny’s friend any more, that Roy felt that Johnny and his girlfriend were too snobby, and that Roy didn’t have anything in common with him, that he and Wesley were much better suited as friends. That’s a little closer to what you said, isn’t it Doreen?” Joanne paused a moment to gather her thoughts. “You knew Johnny’s girlfriend was in the bathroom listening to the whole thing, didn’t you? You said all those lies on purpose, knowing she would probably tell Johnny, didn’t you?” Joanne’s voice had risen again, and it was trembling with rage.

Johnny swallowed hard as he sat in the kitchen chair, his hand clenched tightly on the edge of the table. He now knew that everything Doreen had said had been lies, but it still hurt to hear it verbalized again, the memory of finding out about it made his stomach clench. Anger grew within him as he continued to listen to the two women argue. He was glad the children had gone to a neighbor’s house to play.

Doreen shook her head incredulously. “You’re crazy, Joanne. I didn’t know anyone else was in there. And what I said was the truth. Wesley told me how Roy has confided in him about having John as a partner, and he wants nothing to do with him any more. Roy told Wesley he feels safer working with him.”

Joanne wondered what kind of delusions Wesley had been feeding his wife. “He told him nothing of the kind. Your husband’s living in a fantasy world, Doreen!”

“I frankly don’t know how either of you can stand spending time with him or his girlfriend anyway.” Doreen’s voice was loud now, not caring who heard her. “The man’s a show-off, and his stuck-up girlfriend is a spoiled little snob!”

Joanne’s eyes grew wide and her face was red, but she held her anger in check. “I’m not even going to begin to try to explain to you what kind of person John Gage is, or even Heather Banks, because I know I’d be wasting my breath. It’s obvious that you and your husband aren’t able to distinguish between good honorable people and liars. But let me tell you this. You won’t find a finer man, friend, or paramedic than John Gage. He’s saved Roy’s life more than once, and nothing could be further from the truth when you say that Roy doesn’t feel safe working with Johnny. I feel better just knowing that Johnny is working with Roy every shift, which is something I’ve never felt about him working with Wesley. And as for the friendship between Roy and John, well let me tell you that Roy treasures that friendship, and so do I, and the fact that you and your husband almost ruined it is unforgivable to me.”

In the kitchen, a large lump was growing in Johnny’s throat, and he continued to listen, frozen to his spot.

Doreen was incensed. “Well let me tell you what I think is unforgivable! Wesley and I have gone out of our way to be friends to you and Roy! All the hours Wes has spent over here helping you and Roy with different things, watching your kids, taking care of things for you when you were in the hospital, and this is the thanks we get! We’ve been good friends, Joanne, something you obviously know nothing about! And I don’t know what kind of game your husband is playing, but Roy did say those things to Wes about his ‘former’ partner! I don’t know why you’re trying to deny it – probably because he’s sitting in your kitchen right now!” She gestured wildly with her hand. “Or maybe you felt guilty about him finding out the real truth and that’s why he’s staying here!”

Enraged, Joanne pushed herself up off the sofa to a wobbly standing position, balancing on one leg. She leaned forward to emphasize her words as she spoke. “Yes, Wesley’s gone out of his way all right, gone out of his way to tell lies that hurt other people! It’s not Roy who’s playing a game, Doreen; it’s Wesley! And maybe you’d better tell your husband to keep his hands to himself, else he lose his job in addition to this friendship!” She hadn’t meant to say that; it was obvious now that Wesley had duped Doreen into believing his stories, and Doreen had evidently been blind to her husband’s advances on Roy, but the words just slipped out. Joanne almost gasped, stunned at what she’d revealed, but also glad at the same time, thinking that maybe Doreen needed to know what her husband had been up to.

Doreen stared at her. “Just what do you mean by that?”

“I mean that I think that maybe it’s time that you and Wesley have a talk about exactly how he really feels about Roy.”

“What are you insinuating?” Her lip curled in an ugly expression.

“Doreen, Wesley’s feelings for Roy go way beyond friendship.”

Doreen stared at Joanne in disbelief, and her mouth dropped open.

“Wesley’s been harassing Roy…physically.” There. She’d finally said it. She knew that by saying it she very well might be destroying a marriage, and tearing a family apart to boot, but for some reason, she couldn’t hold it back. Doreen deserved to know Wesley’s deceptions, and the anger that Joanne had felt about it was now rearing its ugly head. Wesley had hurt Roy, had hurt Johnny, and now Joanne wanted to hurt Wesley, and even wanted to hurt Doreen, to get her back for her callous remarks that had nearly destroyed a friendship.

Doreen couldn’t handle the truth and went into a fit of rage. “You’re insane!” she screamed, and reached out blindly, pushing Joanne backwards.

Johnny heard the crash as Joanne fell, and bolted into the room. Joanne landed awkwardly on the sofa with a cry, seemingly unhurt; her arm had flung outward knocking the lamp off the table.

Doreen stood in front of her, her face a picture of anguish. “You’re lying!” she screamed.

Joanne lay at an angle on the sofa, trying to push herself up into a sitting position. Johnny was next to her instantly and took her hand to steady her. His eyes were blazing as he glanced up at Doreen, then back at Joanne. “Are you all right?” he asked urgently.

“Yes, I’m fine,” she said breathlessly.

Johnny stood up, his jaw set ominously, as he descended on Doreen. The woman stepped backward, cowed by his expression. Johnny took her by the arm, pulling her away from Joanne. “You’re leaving. Now.” His jaw was clenched as he continued to pull her toward the door.

Doreen struggled to get out of his grasp, while glancing over her shoulder at Joanne, her eyes frantically searching Joanne’s to see if she was telling the truth. Joanne’s expression was slowly transforming into one of sympathy.

“You’re lying!” she screamed. “Not Wesley! He couldn’t!”

Johnny dragged her by the arm to the door and had it open now. Doreen had managed to wrestle herself out of Johnny’s grasp and stood shaking for a moment, her face a picture of despair. She stared at Joanne a moment longer, then was out the door, not being able to bear the expression on Joanne’s face any longer.

Johnny watched as the distraught woman ran to her car in tears, then slowly closed the door. Joanne had arranged herself in an upright position on the couch now, and Johnny saw her grimace as she tried to lift her leg to situate it back on the pillow. Hastily, he made his way over to help her, his concern at her discomfort outweighing his rage.

He lifted her leg gingerly, positioning it atop the pillow on the coffee table. Joanne was touched by the obvious concern on his face and in his voice as he asked again, “Are you all right?” Does your leg hurt? Is there anything I can get you?” He seemed so anxious to be able to alleviate her discomfort that she finally asked if he would get her a glass of water, if only to give her a chance to calm down. Her heart was still pounding from the confrontation and she wondered now how much Johnny had overheard. Probably everything, she thought regretfully.

She smiled up at him as he brought her the water, thanking him.

“You sure you’re all right?” he asked once again.

“Yes, I’m fine. Quit worrying.” She looked up at him. “I’m sorry about what happened, Johnny.”

“Sorry? Why? It wasn’t your fault.”

“I know. Just…sorry you had to hear the horrible things she said. You’ve suffered enough already without having to hear that.”

He shrugged. “It’s okay.”

She went on. “I’m sorry for a lot of things, Johnny. Sorry all this has caused you so much pain. I’m sorry we didn’t realize it, didn’t recognize Wesley’s deceptions. And I’m sorry you quit your job because of it.” Her voice wavered slightly as emotions overcame her.

“Joanne – ”

“No. It needs to be said.” She placed her palm on his cheek. “You mean the world to us, you know that?”

He lowered his eyes; a trace of a small smile appeared as he glanced shyly up at her. “The feeling is mutual.”

“I hope you don’t believe anything she said.”

He shook his head. “I don’t, at least not now, anyway.”

She nodded. “I’m just sorry you ever did. Johnny, I….hope you’ll consider coming back to work – when you’re all healed up, of course.”

He sighed deeply. “Joanne, that’s kinda hard for me to think about right now. I’ve got so many other things…”

“I know. But things will fall into place. Just give it time,” she said gently, patting his hand. “And…think about it. Roy’s…pretty sure he’s going to leave 51’s.”

Johnny looked up at her in surprise, his face betraying just a hint of hope. Roy had mentioned this to him before, but it was still hard to believe that Roy would leave 51’s after all his years there to start with another crew.

“I’m not kidding. He can’t stand working with Wesley anymore.”

“I can’t blame him,” Johnny responded sympathetically.

“Maybe the two of you can find a place…to work together,” she said hopefully.

Johnny nodded. “Maybe.” That was all he said. Thinking about finding work was just one more headache on top of everything else. Maybe if he got some other things in order first….maybe.

“Anyway, thank you, Johnny. I’m glad you were here. I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t.”

Johnny shivered at that thought. The woman had pushed Joanne. She hadn’t been hurt, but could have been. Who knew what might have happened if Johnny hadn’t been there to stop her? “I’m glad I was here too. I’m just sorry I let her in the house.”

“That wasn’t your fault. She pushed her way in. Let’s just…forget about it, okay?”

“Sounds good,” Johnny offered a smile and stood up. Trying to change the subject, he asked, “So, what do you want for dinner?”

“I don’t know,” she sighed. “How ‘bout we just order a pizza?”

“Good deal.” He was relieved. The last thing he felt like doing was preparing dinner. After his drinking binge the night before, he’d been nursing a headache and nausea all day. Doreen’s visit had only made it worse.

Joanne had suggested it because he was recuperating from surgery as well, and she didn’t want him waiting on her. He’d done enough of that already.

Between the two of them, they decided what they wanted on their pizza and soon their dinner had arrived. Johnny called the kids home, and together they had a fairly enjoyable evening. It was weird, Johnny thought, spending time with Roy’s family without him being there.

Late that night, after Johnny and the children had gone to bed, Joanne lay in bed unable to sleep. She decided to call Roy and tell him what happened. She thought it might be wise; she didn’t know if Doreen had already called Wesley to tell him her version of the story, but decided she couldn’t keep the confrontation to herself until morning. Around eleven o’clock, Joanne called the station, relieved to find that Roy was there. Per her request, she spoke to him privately in the Cap’s office, with the door closed.

Roy was furious; it was everything Joanne could do to keep him from storming out of there and strangling Wesley. She finally managed to convince him not to do anything rash, that no harm had been done. She mostly had just wanted Roy to be aware of what had gone down, and Doreen’s reaction to what she told her. Joanne had a feeling that Doreen and Wesley might have their own confrontation soon, and she was afraid that the wrath of that conversation might be taken out on her husband by his ‘partner’.

Roy barely slept that night, livid at what Joanne had told him. He could barely stand to look at Wesley as he lay in the bed next to him, Johnny’s bed, only a few feet away. Finally the morning came, and Roy was the first one up. As soon as his replacement arrived, Roy was in the dorm changing his clothes, anxious to get home to his wife.

Roy turned his back to Wesley as the man entered to change his own clothes. Roy wondered if Doreen had called to tell him what happened, but suspected she hadn’t, since he hadn’t heard the phone ring, other than Joanne’s call. Just as he was getting ready to leave, Wesley spoke to him.

Wesley had been trying his best lately to be pleasant and nonconfrontational in order to try to win back Roy’s friendship. So far, he’d been unsuccessful; it was one of the reasons why he’d sent Doreen over to talk to Joanne yesterday, in the hopes of strengthening the wives’ friendships to influence Roy. He was anxious himself to get home to talk to her to see how it went. His tone was hesitant and soft. “So, uh, Roy, what’re you going to be doing today?”

Slowly turning to face the man, Roy’s face was stony and his blue eyes pierced Wesley’s as he spat in a low, venomous voice, “It’s none of your damn business, Adams. And you better get this straight; you tell your wife she better never come around our house again; and that goes for you too.” With that, Roy slammed his locker door shut and stormed from the room before Wesley had a chance to say anything.

There was hell to pay for Wesley Adams when he arrived home that day. It’s a good thing their own children were in school and didn’t have to witness the explosion that happened when Doreen confronted Wesley with what Joanne had told her the previous day.

Wesley refused to admit anything, and instead blamed Doreen for blundering at the DeSoto residence. He was so enraged, that he gave his wife a black eye, and then left, actually considering going to the DeSotos’ to apologize for Doreen. Thinking better of it, he decided he would wait and talk to Roy about it during their next shift. Instead, he drove around aimlessly, consumed with a sick feeling that things were slowly beginning to deteriorate around him. When he returned, Doreen and the children were gone; no note was left, so he wasn’t sure if they were just at some appointment, or worse, maybe Doreen had left him. Remembering the look in her eyes that morning after he had hit her sent him into a panic. When they didn’t return home that night, he flew into a rage, nearly destroying everything in their home that was breakable.

Roy grew more and more anxious as he drove home that morning, his quest to make sure his wife was okay consuming him. Relief flooded him when he walked in the door to a normal scene; well, it was normal if you expected to see your best friend in the kitchen cooking breakfast for you and your wife, which was exactly what Johnny was doing. Joanne looked no worse for wear, and the light-haired paramedic finally relaxed and was able to enjoy his French toast. Johnny was quiet during breakfast, which had seemed to be the norm ever since he’d arrived, and after they’d finished eating, Roy made sure he helped Joanne get comfortable in the living room before he came back into the kitchen to do the dishes. Johnny had already started on them, and Roy reached over to shut the faucet off, handing Johnny a towel. “I’ll do those.”

Johnny shrugged. “Suit yourself.”

Roy lowered his voice. “Can I talk to you a minute?” He motioned for Johnny to come outside and onto the porch. Johnny followed him out there, and they sat down together on the steps of the deck. Needing to be sure that there wasn’t anything Joanne had left out in an effort to protect him, Roy began to question Johnny over exactly what had happened with Doreen the day before. Johnny told him step by step the progression of events, then looked out into the yard, his gaze solemn.

Roy was quiet too when Johnny finally finished explaining the details, sitting with his hands loosely clasped between his knees, twiddling his thumbs. He looked hard at his friend, suddenly feeling overcome with gratitude. He’d often missed Johnny during his long absence at the station, but it hadn’t hit him thoroughly until right at that moment as they sat next to each other on the deck. Good old Johnny, crazy, unpredictable, neurotic, and sometimes insecure Johnny. But it was the deeper and often hidden side of his friend that had made Roy realize why Johnny was his best friend. And times like this. It didn’t matter that they had different personalities, that they looked at certain things differently. The loyal, honest, trustworthy, and dependable Johnny was what made him the true, lifetime friend that Roy knew they would always be. Their relationship had been tumultuous lately to say the least, but Roy knew without a doubt that it was just a bump in the long road of friendship that lay ahead of them. His unfortunate relationship with Wesley made him appreciate his dark-haired friend all the more. “I want to thank you, Johnny. I appreciate what you did yesterday.”

Johnny looked over at Roy with a frown. “Yeah. I did a lot. I let Adam’s wife into the house, then went into the kitchen. I left Joanne alone with her; she could have really been hurt.”

Roy’s mouth dropped open. “You did do a lot. You made sure Joanne was okay, and then you got Doreen out of the house. Who knows what would have happened if you hadn’t been there?”

“I never should have let her in in the first place,” he mumbled.

“Johnny, you didn’t know the woman was capable of violence. I mean, who would have guessed that meek, mild little Doreen could be dangerous?”

“I should have come out and stopped it when they were arguing. I just didn’t wanna interfere, you know?”

“I’m sure it was an uncomfortable situation.”

Uncomfortable is a mild way of putting it.

“Anyway…thanks.”

Johnny sighed. “You’re welcome. I’m just glad Joanne’s all right.”

“Me too.”

Johnny turned to Roy and looked him in the eye. “You know, this Wesley character might be dangerous too, Roy. It’s obvious that his head isn’t on straight. You said yourself you’re suspicious that he might have been the one that tampered with Chet’s brakes.”

Roy rested his head on his fist glumly. “I know. It’s not just the harassment any more. It’s everything. The guy gives me the creeps. I know I’ve gotta do something about it. I think I’m gonna go talk to headquarters and see if they’ll transfer me somewhere else.”

“I think that’s a wise decision,” Johnny said quietly.

Roy looked over at his friend expectantly. “You, uh, still interested in bein’ my partner again?”

Johnny smiled, but was noncommittal. “Well, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to check into it; see if there’s two openings somewhere for a team of paramedics. But, don’t let that hold you back, Roy. If there’s an opening somewhere you wanna take just for yourself, take it. Don’t wait for me. I…I’m not sure yet what I’m gonna do. I don’t even know when Dr. Early is gonna clear me for work. I’ve still gotta take the blood-thinners for awhile.”

Roy nodded, not wanting to push it. Just the fact that Johnny didn’t say he wouldn’t be interested was encouraging. Maybe if Roy could find the right opening somewhere, he could entice Johnny into rejoining the department. Either way, Roy knew he had to do something soon.

Roy had dreaded returning to work the next day. Wesley’s mood seemed volatile; it was as if a dark cloud was hovering over him, ready to explode into a storm at any second. Adams spoke to no one except the Cap, and that was only when addressed; otherwise, his gaze was cast downward. His distant stare shadowed an almost evil look in his eyes that chilled Roy to the bone. Roy wondered what might have transpired between Wesley and his wife the day before, thinking it must have been something bad.

Everyone stayed away from him, sensing it wouldn’t be wise to confront the man; even Captain Stanley felt on edge, and decided if Wesley didn’t shape up, he would have to have another talk with him. It seemed the close-knit cohesiveness of his crew had been slowly fraying ever since Wesley had joined them; now everyone was on edge. He missed the jovial bantering that used to go on between his shift-mates, and was getting tired of the near-constant tension around the station.

Wesley had indeed retreated into a dark tunnel of hatred; he blamed everyone but himself for his troubles – Roy, Chet, Doreen, Joanne, and most of all, his unwitting nemesis, John Gage. Because of him he had lost his lifeline, not only the friendship he had with Roy, but the promise of something even more developing between them. His wife had left him, had taken the children with her, he suspected, and all of it was Gage’s fault. He wanted to lash out, to get even, to get revenge, but his mind was so clouded with hate he could barely think. Things were such a mess, had gone so awry, he was terrified there wasn’t anything he could do to right them. He thought that maybe if time went by things might calm down, and he could rebuild his friendship with Roy. Maybe he would get another chance. After all, his job wasn’t in jeopardy. As long as he worked with Roy, he still had a chance with him, no matter how long it took. And it would take a long time, he was sure of that. It would be a long, uphill battle, but he was determined to make it work. Maybe Doreen’s departure could even work to his advantage; Roy might feel sorry for him when he found out his wife and children left him. As long as he could stay on at 51’s, that was the key.

There was one problem though – Chet Kelly. It was well known now that Chet and his girlfriend were leaving in a few days for a ‘vacation’ in Vegas. But Wesley knew what the sneaky little Irishman was really up to. He was going to try to expose Wesley’s ‘discrepancies’, in the hopes of ousting him from the department. Just like it had happened before. Well, this time, Wesley was certain that wasn’t going to happen. He had to think of a way to stop him before he carried through with his threat, a threat Adams learned by eavesdropping that had only been revealed to Roy DeSoto. All the others assumed Chet was just going for pleasure.

Wesley racked his brain for a way to prevent Chet from going. The failed brake job had been disappointing; he had been hoping that it would happen when Chet was on the freeway going fast, so that any crash would have killed him. Instead, Chet had been going slower, and merely back-ended someone. Ever since Kelly had found out that someone had ‘likely’ tampered with his brakes, the Irishman had glared ominously at Wes every time he’d looked at him, the accusation clear in his eyes. Fortunately, there was no way to prove anything.

An unexpected opportunity arose later that day, and Wesley took advantage of it. He couldn’t believe his luck at being sent into the smoking building with Chet and Roy that evening to look for two possible trapped people. As soon as Roy found one victim, Wesley had helped load him onto Roy’s shoulder, and received instructions to stay there with Chet to keep looking for one more person. It was the perfect situation. He was alone in the building with Kelly; all he had to do now was figure out a way to eliminate him without anyone knowing. It shouldn’t be that hard.

Chet was checking rooms on one side of a hallway, and Wesley, the other. The building was filled with smoke, and they knew fire was within the walls. It was a dangerous situation, and they were under a limited time period to look before the building exploded into flames. Wesley stepped into one room, and immediately the floor began to give under his foot. He jumped back quickly, before it collapsed, and an idea popped instantly into his head. Circling around the weak spot on the floor, he found that the area along the wall would take his weight safely. Making his way back to the hallway, he thrust his head out the door, and called for Chet. “Kelly! I got a victim in here!”

Chet turned at his voice, and hastily made his way toward the room Wesley was in. Wesley crept quickly along the wall and around the weak spot in the floor, making his way to the back of the room. Chet appeared at the door, and when Wesley saw his hazy form in the doorway, he called out to him. “Kelly! Hurry! Back here! I need help now!”

Chet burst into the room, stepping right onto the weak section of the floor. Immediately, it gave way, and Wesley watched with a smile as Chet fell through.

Chet felt the floor give, and with a sickening burst of fear-induced adrenalin, clawed at the air to keep himself from going down. He caught a brief glimpse of Wesley’s face before he fell, the foggy smile behind the masked man’s face chilling him. Splintering wood gave way under his feet and he fell downward, then stopped abruptly as his arm got tangled in the woodwork. Seconds later, pain rippled through his entire arm and he felt a snap as it was wrenched into an unnatural position. Chet yelled as he hung suspended in the hole, his caught broken arm wedged awkwardly against the floorboards and framing, preventing him from falling all the way through. Other boards were digging into his torso, making it hard to breathe.

Gasping, Chet looked up, searching for Wesley. He was just standing there, staring down at him, and terror pulsed through Chet when he saw the man make no attempt to help him. “Adams, help me!” he strained out painfully. Chet clawed at the air with his other hand, reaching for Adams to pull him out. “C’mon, man! Help me out!” Beads of sweat broke out on Chet’s face from the strain, and he groaned against the pain.

Wesley walked up to Chet and crouched down within a few feet of him. “Sorry, buddy, but I just can’t do it.” Wesley shook his head, his voice sounding hollow and cold through the mask. “It’s too bad, really. If you’d have just kept your nose out of my business, I wouldn’t have had to do this.”

“Wha…what’re you talkin’…about?” Chet was having trouble talking now.

“You know what I’m talking about, Kelly. Your little Vegas trip; you know, the one where you were gonna go try to dig up dirt on me? Well, I couldn’t let that happen. Because I’m not the one leaving 51’s. You are.”

Chet looked at him in panic. “Look, Wesley; don’t do this, man. We can…talk about it; just…get me outta here. Please.” 

Wesley shook his head. “Just consider this payback for all the shit you’ve pulled on me over the last few months, Kelly.” With one quick motion, Wes reached down and ripped Chet’s air mask away from him, tossing it aside, too far away for Chet to reach.

Chet began coughing almost immediately, the toxic fumes around him so thick that he could barely see Wesley. Frantically, he grappled for the mask, unable to reach it. “Wes! Don’t! C’mon, man, give me…my mask!”

“It’s too bad your mask came off when you fell, and that I wasn’t anywhere around when it happened. In fact, I searched, and just couldn’t find you.”

Chet’s heart was pounding in terror now, and it was becoming much harder to breathe. The smoke burned his eyes and tears ran down his face into his mustache. Through his coughs, he yelled, “Wesley, you don’t wanna…kill me! They’ll put you…in jail! Look, I won’t go….Vegas! I won’t say anything, man! C’….mon! Help…me!” A series of coughs racked his body.

“Oh, but you’re wrong, Chester. I do wanna kill you. And after you’re gone, I’m gonna get Gage. He can join you in purgatory.”

Chet’s eyes widened as Wesley stood up, and it finally hit him that he was going to die here. He watched as Wesley’s feet walked by him, then disappeared into the haze. He didn’t see the door to the room close, nor did he see Wes shove fallen debris in front of it. Not caring how much his arm hurt, he frantically struggled to free himself, crying out from the pain. His lungs burned from the smoke, while his legs swung madly below the floor, his feet pedaling the air to get a foothold. The coughing grew so bad that he could get very little air, and soon his vision began to gray as his oxygen was depleted.

The building was burning now; the flames finally pushing their way through the walls and the ceilings, and Wesley hastily made his way down the hallway, away from Chet, in the opposite direction from which he had entered. He had no desire to burn up in the building, but kept checking for victims on his way out. It was only by chance that he saw a pair of legs lying prone inside one of the doorways, and so he bent to scoop the person up, slinging them over his shoulder as he made his way down the stairs of the structure. A moment later, he heard Captain Stanley call to evacuate the building over his HT. He decided to respond, informing them that he was bringing a victim out, and would be out shortly.

He headed for the back of the building in an effort to remain unseen, so that the maximum amount of time would elapse before anyone got to Kelly to try to rescue him. He exited through the back door with his victim, then laid the man down on the ground while he caught his breath, and waited. He didn’t care that the victim was in respiratory distress; he had to make certain that Kelly would asphyxiate himself before anyone found him.

A voice behind him jolted him, and fear consumed him when he saw Marco Lopez had come around the corner with an inch and half, and was staring at him.

            Marco looked confused at first, wondering why Wesley was just standing there with his victim lying on the ground. Marco ran toward him, dropping the hose. “Wes! Are…are all right?”

            Wesley recovered quickly. “Y-yeah. I was just bringing the victim out, and, ah, I…got a little dizzy.” Wesley bent down and pulled the man back onto his shoulder, then quickly brushed by Marco.

            “Wesley, wait!” Marco looked around. “Where’s Chet?”

            Wesley stopped and turned slowly, forcing a look of surprise on his face. “He’s not out here?”

            “No!”

            Wesley gave a performance worthy of an Oscar when he frantically explained to Marco that he thought Chet had already exited the building before him, upon hearing the evacuation notice. Marco asked where Wesley had last seen Chet, and Wesley told him the east side of the building on the first floor. In reality, Chet was upstairs on the west side of the building. Marco asked if Wesley needed any help with his victim, and when Adams declined, Marco made a mad dash back to the front of the building to tell his captain that one of his men was missing.

            Wesley was sure Chet was dead. What he had forgotten and didn’t count on was the fact that Chet had an HT with him, and when Captain Stanley tried to raise Chet on it, it acted as a homing device. The men were able to locate him fairly quickly by listening to their voices being transmitted over the handi-talki. By that time, Roy was finished treating his victim, and together with Captain Stanley and Marco, he joined in the search for Chet. They finally found him, unconscious, stuck in the floor, not breathing. Wesley was ordered to stay outside, in order to treat his victim.

Two hours later, Chet lay unconscious in one of Rampart’s emergency treatment rooms, a ventilator breathing artificially for him. Dr. Brackett had finally gotten his vitals stabilized, and now the fireman lay oblivious to the fact that he’d very nearly died. No one knew for sure how long he’d been without air, or if there would be any brain damage, that is, if he ever regained consciousness.

All the men were shaken over Chet’s accident. They had all stayed at Rampart for the evening, waiting to hear news of Chet, while leaving themselves available. They reluctantly left when Dr. Brackett grimly informed them that he wouldn’t know anything more until some time had passed, and that they should probably just wait till morning for further news. The A-shift left on the condition that they would be called immediately with any change in Chet’s condition. Dixie herself assured that promise; her heart went out to them all. It seemed like this crew of men had certainly had their share of bad breaks lately; first Johnny, and now Chet’s life hung in the balance.

By the time they returned to their quarters, it was late, but not too late for Captain Stanley to call Wesley into his office for a full report of what had happened in that building. Wesley had been rehearsing his story in his mind throughout the evening, and by the time Hank Stanley questioned him, he had it down convincingly:  They went in looking for victims; the last time Wesley saw Chet was on the first floor of the building; afterward he’d gone upstairs to search, leaving Chet downstairs. Wesley found his victim, got the evacuation notice, and then left the building, assuming that since Chet was downstairs, he had already made it out of the building.

Captain Stanley listened; it all sounded reasonable, and there wasn’t any reason to assume there had been any foul play. But nevertheless, Hank had an uneasy feeling in his gut. It seemed to him that Wesley was too cool; there was something about his demeanor that made Hank nervous, but he couldn’t quite figure it out. Knowing there wasn’t any love lost between Chet and Wes raised his suspicions as well, but he knew that Kelly could be an aggravation at times, and that he had to give fair treatment to all his men, and give the benefit of the doubt until there was no doubt. The problems Wes had created for Roy added to the mix, and the entire crew’s recent discomfort of working with Adams certainly should be taken in to account, but Hank refused to believe that the man would purposely try to harm one of his crewmates.

There were, however, two things that didn’t seem to add up. One, Chet was found upstairs; Wesley’s story had been that Chet was downstairs.  And two, why was the door leading to the room Chet was in shut with debris in front of it? Wesley insisted he never saw Chet; maybe it was because the smoke had been so thick. As for the door, he surmised that maybe it had swung closed after Chet entered the room, and that the debris had fallen in front of it. Captain Stanley thought that that part of Wes’s story was a bit shaky, but didn’t express his misgivings, instead wanting to think it through more clearly to find any loopholes before he questioned the man further. He would be making a full report to headquarters in the morning, and there would certainly be an investigation. Right now, however, he had nothing more to go on.

The men were somber, worried, and tired when they returned to the station. Marco took it especially hard, and insisted he be the one to call Chet’s family. It was hard listening to him on the telephone as he talked with Chet’s parents and sister, his voice cracking with emotion he tried to suppress his anguish.

Roy had called home with the bad news late that night, speaking with Joanne first, and then with Johnny, whose reaction was surprisingly subdued. Roy wasn’t fooled though, he could hear the concern in the catch of John’s voice as he asked questions about the incident, and knew just from Johnny’s tone that his friend was upset. Roy knew Chet and Johnny were close, much closer than anyone would have guessed by their outward treatment of each other. But they spent time together outside of work, and especially lately, Chet had really stood up for Johnny in an almost overprotective way. Roy felt bad having to call so late and lay such bad news on him, but he knew Johnny would have wanted to know – deserved to know. Roy had to talk him out of getting in the car and driving to Rampart, telling him they weren’t going to let him see Chet this late anyway, and reminded him of the fact that he wasn’t supposed to be driving yet. Roy promised he would pick them both up in the morning and they would all go to Rampart together to see Chet.

Late that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Marco remained in the day room, sitting at the table staring at nothing, unable to sleep. His Captain knew he was up, and at one a.m., decided to get up and join him. He wasn’t getting any sleep anyway. They sat and talked quietly for nearly a half an hour, trying to figure out the reason for what had happened. It was then that Marco mentioned seeing Wesley standing outside the back entrance of the building, with his victim lying on the ground. Hank’s brow furrowed as Marco told him of their conversation; the information just added another piece of the puzzle that wasn’t fitting in. Marco hadn’t thought earlier to mention it; he’d been too distraught over Chet’s injury to think about it, but now that he’d calmed down and began to reconstruct that scenario in his mind, he wondered out loud with the Cap at the legitimacy of Wesley’s excuse for standing there with his victim lying on the ground, without first checking to be sure that Chet got out. Or at least contact them to find out if he did. Wesley’s victim was also at Rampart, in a condition similar to Chet’s, although he had a more promising prognosis. Captain Stanley intended to question that man as soon as he was able to answer, and had asked Dr. Brackett to let him know when that would be possible.

Hank finally managed to convince Marco to go to bed to try to get some sleep around two a.m., and together, they headed back to the dorm. No one slept well that night, but especially Hank Stanley, who tossed and turned till dawn, hoping that maybe things would become clearer in the morning. One thing was for sure, he intended to get to the bottom of it.

Wesley remained quiet, glad on the one hand that he had thwarted Chet Kelly’s trip to Vegas, but nervous on the other hand that he might recover and tell what had happened. He just had to hope he wouldn’t; the doctor had seemed pretty grave about the whole situation, and even if Chet did survive, he would probably be brain damaged. If that were the case, no one would believe Chet if he accused Wesley of harming him. His evil act had only served to fuel the fire where his lost relationship with Roy was concerned, and now that he had likely succeeded in ridding himself of Chet, he was driven even harder to take care of Gage, and be rid of them both. He had two days off now to figure out just how to do that.

Part 12