30 Days to a More Powerful Vocabulary

By Whisper

"Rampart, this is Squad 51. How do you read?"

"Loud and Clear, 51."

"Rampart, we have a 30 year old garbologist who suffered a disjunction of his right hallux while searching for pellucid cullet at a local refuse collection site. He also has a distinct hematoma and is experiencing some discomfort with mandibular movement. He states that the injuries are unrelated. The facial injury occurred yesterday following an altercation with his spouse, who he now considers his antipode, who informed him that his current career is otiose and proceeded to defenstrate his collection. He states he is highly upset by the degree of disunity that currently exists in his life and has been unable to consume any sustenance since yesterday, a fact supported by loud borborygmus. He is embrangled by the sudden change in his relationship and feels it is having a negative impact on his karma."

"Um, I almost hate to say this, but could you repeat that, 51?"

Johnny smiled and opened his mouth to begin again but was stopped when Roy growled at him and grabbed the phone.

"Rampart, the victim broke his toe while trolling in a junk yard. He also has a bruise and a sore jaw after a fight with his wife yesterday. He’s experiencing some gastrointestinal distress due to not eating in 24 hours. He says he’s under a lot of stress. And speaking of stress, Dixie, if I ever can prove that you’re the one who gave Johnny the book on improving his vocabulary, I will find a way to make you pay…. dearly."

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